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Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Secrets of A Romantic Couple
A romantic couple has a better chance of a happy marriage. When a relationship is new, it often is filled with romance. Over time, however, we tend to get busied by everyday life, like children, work, stress, fatigue, unresolved conflict, and misplaced priorities. We feel we just don't have time or energy for romance. While we can't get rid of all of these responsibilities and obligations, we can make conscious, thoughtful choices about how we respond to them. These responses can make us a more romantic couple.
We can decide that, rather than simply going with the flow of life, it's important to regularly step back from the flow and see your mate and your marriage with refreshed perspective. Look with new eyes and a new attitude that says, "This is the most important person in life to me, and I want every choice I make, every action I take, to reflect that truth." If one or both of you can maintain that perspective in your marriage, you'll see your romance-quotient go way up as you become a more romantic couple.
Tips to become a more romantic couple:
• Romantic Couple Tip 1 - Spend fun time alone together
Spend plenty of time engaged in enjoyable activities. Go for a walk, and hold hands. Enjoy meals out together—even if it's just a picnic. Make passionate love to each other in ways that are mutually satisfying and meaningful. Try something you haven't done together before—attend a play, take in a roller derby, ride on a roller coaster, go fishing. The possibilities are endless, but the point is simply to find ways to have fun together, increasing the feelings of warmth and enjoyment as a romantic couple.
• Romantic Couple Tip 2 - Dream together
Become a more romantic couple by developing shared dreams for your relationship and your life together, and make plans that will help you make those dreams into reality. Working side-by-side toward a common goal can be very romantic.
• Romantic Couple Tip 3 - Look at each other
Remember when you first met? How you gazed and smiled at each other? There's just something about positive eye contact and warm smiles that can light the fire within a romantic couple’s hearts and excite a relationship like nothing else.
• Romantic Couple Tip 4 - Build each other up
Work on spending more and more time encouraging and supporting each other. What do you love about your spouse, that brought you together as a romantic couple in the first place? Communicate what you admire about each other, and why you like being together.
• Romantic Couple Tip 5 - Do little things
Do little things that say, "I care about you," "You mean a lot to me," and "I'm glad you are in my life." Write a simple note that says, "I love you," or bring home some special thing you know your spouse likes. An unexpected caress or a compliment can go a long way in boosting the feelings of a romantic couple, feelings of love and mutual appreciation for the gift you are to each other.
Becoming a more romantic couple isn't so much about learning new skills; it's more often about forgetting routine, predictable patterns. It's important for your love affair that you don't take each other for granted. Dare to find new, creative, and even surprising ways to express your care for your partner. Take some chances, try some new expressions of love, and put energy into the process. You may find, as many have, that the flames of love can be fanned in such a way as to make you and your spouse a more giving, special and romantic couple.
source: http://marriage.eharmony.com/advice/marriage-tips-8.html
We can decide that, rather than simply going with the flow of life, it's important to regularly step back from the flow and see your mate and your marriage with refreshed perspective. Look with new eyes and a new attitude that says, "This is the most important person in life to me, and I want every choice I make, every action I take, to reflect that truth." If one or both of you can maintain that perspective in your marriage, you'll see your romance-quotient go way up as you become a more romantic couple.
Tips to become a more romantic couple:
• Romantic Couple Tip 1 - Spend fun time alone together
Spend plenty of time engaged in enjoyable activities. Go for a walk, and hold hands. Enjoy meals out together—even if it's just a picnic. Make passionate love to each other in ways that are mutually satisfying and meaningful. Try something you haven't done together before—attend a play, take in a roller derby, ride on a roller coaster, go fishing. The possibilities are endless, but the point is simply to find ways to have fun together, increasing the feelings of warmth and enjoyment as a romantic couple.
• Romantic Couple Tip 2 - Dream together
Become a more romantic couple by developing shared dreams for your relationship and your life together, and make plans that will help you make those dreams into reality. Working side-by-side toward a common goal can be very romantic.
• Romantic Couple Tip 3 - Look at each other
Remember when you first met? How you gazed and smiled at each other? There's just something about positive eye contact and warm smiles that can light the fire within a romantic couple’s hearts and excite a relationship like nothing else.
• Romantic Couple Tip 4 - Build each other up
Work on spending more and more time encouraging and supporting each other. What do you love about your spouse, that brought you together as a romantic couple in the first place? Communicate what you admire about each other, and why you like being together.
• Romantic Couple Tip 5 - Do little things
Do little things that say, "I care about you," "You mean a lot to me," and "I'm glad you are in my life." Write a simple note that says, "I love you," or bring home some special thing you know your spouse likes. An unexpected caress or a compliment can go a long way in boosting the feelings of a romantic couple, feelings of love and mutual appreciation for the gift you are to each other.
Becoming a more romantic couple isn't so much about learning new skills; it's more often about forgetting routine, predictable patterns. It's important for your love affair that you don't take each other for granted. Dare to find new, creative, and even surprising ways to express your care for your partner. Take some chances, try some new expressions of love, and put energy into the process. You may find, as many have, that the flames of love can be fanned in such a way as to make you and your spouse a more giving, special and romantic couple.
source: http://marriage.eharmony.com/advice/marriage-tips-8.html
Saturday, July 4, 2009
WHAT GIRLS LOOK FOR
A girl's mind works in strange ways-as if you didn't know-and the things that attract them to men are mostly NOT what you expect . Here's what they are( not necessarily in order of importance ) :--
Honesty
Sense of humor
Eye contact
Smiles
Personality
Confidence
Maturity
Sensitivity
Looks (this one is definitely in the right place in order of importance!)
Ever noticed how a girl goes completely berserk when she finds out you've lied . What's all the fuss about? you think . The big fuss they make tells you something crucial -- HONESTY is very very important to girls. Remember this if you are naturally honest and use your honesty to full advantage. Be honest with her even if your natural instinct in a particular situation is not to be . If you are naturally dishonest conceal this at all costs-you're probably good at that anyway!
A good sense of humor is amazingly attractive to most girls . They want a man who is FUN to be with .If you can make a girl laugh you're 90% there . If you have a good sense of humor-use it at every appropriate opportunity . If you haven't- WORK on it - and develop one . This can be done - watch those that have this and use their techniques - try the one that suits your personality best-experiment .
EYE-CONTACT is in my opinion the single most important factor in your success and for this reason I will go into this in more detail later . (similarly with SMILES )
A strong personality draws most girls . They really do go for a man who knows what he wants to do - no matter what anybody else thinks about him .
Girls are also drawn to confident men who are assertive , positive and don't dither . If you are less than confident - don't show it . LOOK CONFIDENT . How do you do this? TRY-study body language , either get a book on this or just observe & imitate any confident men you see around you . Stand up straight ,never fidget , head up high , slow ,steady movements and above all EYE to EYE contact at all times. You know the things I mean -observe & learn & apply .
Maturity is a big turn on with most girls . This is one reason that quite a lot find older men attractive . So it usually pays to act pretty sensibly when you're with girls ( not to the extent that you lose your sense of humor and fun of course ). Drinking beer until it comes out of your ears, falling over senseless and going on the rampage might be a good laugh when you're with the lads but it won't impress her. She might laugh but inside she'll be eaten up with embarrassment.
A lot of men think that girls are turned on by very macho men - but most girls think completely the OPPOSITE . Girls like their men to be sensitive . Don't take this too far , girls want their men to act like men but try and mix being a man with being caring and sensitive . A heady cocktail that girls find irresistible ! If you find something 'nice' or 'pretty' or something upsets you - tell her. You'll be surprised how much she warms to you . Especially if the something nice or pretty is about her!!
Whilst girls obviously go for good looks and a decent body it comes surprisingly LOW on THEIR list of priorities . By itself it doesn't turn them on like it does men . Ask a girl if she is turned on by these things , she will probably say yes but deep down a girl knows she can't find any man a turn-on unless he CARES for her too.
For this reason , if you are worried about your looks and body (and who isn't?)-put your worry out of your mind and concentrate on the things given in this book that girls want . This is probably the hardest thing that you have to do in the entire book.
source: http://www.datingclass.com/successful/what-girls-look-for.shtml
Honesty
Sense of humor
Eye contact
Smiles
Personality
Confidence
Maturity
Sensitivity
Looks (this one is definitely in the right place in order of importance!)
Ever noticed how a girl goes completely berserk when she finds out you've lied . What's all the fuss about? you think . The big fuss they make tells you something crucial -- HONESTY is very very important to girls. Remember this if you are naturally honest and use your honesty to full advantage. Be honest with her even if your natural instinct in a particular situation is not to be . If you are naturally dishonest conceal this at all costs-you're probably good at that anyway!
A good sense of humor is amazingly attractive to most girls . They want a man who is FUN to be with .If you can make a girl laugh you're 90% there . If you have a good sense of humor-use it at every appropriate opportunity . If you haven't- WORK on it - and develop one . This can be done - watch those that have this and use their techniques - try the one that suits your personality best-experiment .
EYE-CONTACT is in my opinion the single most important factor in your success and for this reason I will go into this in more detail later . (similarly with SMILES )
A strong personality draws most girls . They really do go for a man who knows what he wants to do - no matter what anybody else thinks about him .
Girls are also drawn to confident men who are assertive , positive and don't dither . If you are less than confident - don't show it . LOOK CONFIDENT . How do you do this? TRY-study body language , either get a book on this or just observe & imitate any confident men you see around you . Stand up straight ,never fidget , head up high , slow ,steady movements and above all EYE to EYE contact at all times. You know the things I mean -observe & learn & apply .
Maturity is a big turn on with most girls . This is one reason that quite a lot find older men attractive . So it usually pays to act pretty sensibly when you're with girls ( not to the extent that you lose your sense of humor and fun of course ). Drinking beer until it comes out of your ears, falling over senseless and going on the rampage might be a good laugh when you're with the lads but it won't impress her. She might laugh but inside she'll be eaten up with embarrassment.
A lot of men think that girls are turned on by very macho men - but most girls think completely the OPPOSITE . Girls like their men to be sensitive . Don't take this too far , girls want their men to act like men but try and mix being a man with being caring and sensitive . A heady cocktail that girls find irresistible ! If you find something 'nice' or 'pretty' or something upsets you - tell her. You'll be surprised how much she warms to you . Especially if the something nice or pretty is about her!!
Whilst girls obviously go for good looks and a decent body it comes surprisingly LOW on THEIR list of priorities . By itself it doesn't turn them on like it does men . Ask a girl if she is turned on by these things , she will probably say yes but deep down a girl knows she can't find any man a turn-on unless he CARES for her too.
For this reason , if you are worried about your looks and body (and who isn't?)-put your worry out of your mind and concentrate on the things given in this book that girls want . This is probably the hardest thing that you have to do in the entire book.
source: http://www.datingclass.com/successful/what-girls-look-for.shtml
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Top 10 Things Wives Want From Their Husbands
In no particular order, here are ten things that many wives want from their husbands.
Note that these are "wants" -- not emotional needs. As individuals, we are each responsible for filling our own emotional needs.
We believe that the four basic emotional needs are the need to be loved and to love; the need to belong; the need for a good self-image; and the need for autonomy.
1. Telling Her Daily That She is Loved
Everyone wants to be affirmed. Everyone wants to know they are loved. The best ways to say "I love you" are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.
2. Understanding and Forgiveness
There will be days when your wife will make mistakes or when she will be difficult to be around. No one is perfect. She both wants and deserves your willingness to understand and forgive her. Remember that no relationship can be sustained without forgiveness.
3. Conversation
Don't let your conversations with your wife dwindle to nothing but talk about your kids, your jobs, and the weather. If that happens, your marriage relationship could be in real trouble.
4. Willingness to Make Time for Her and Your Children
Having quality time with your wife and kids isn't something that just happens. You have to make it happen by not only making the plans but by following through. Time with those you love has to be a high priority for you.
5. Saying "Yes" More Than Saying "No"
Habitual negative responses to your wife and kids can push them away from you. Think twice before saying "no" and you will be surprised at how saying "yes" can improve your relationships.
6. Listening Well
It's really disheartening for a wife to share her thoughts and feelings with her mate and then realize that he didn't actually listen to her. Your wife wants you to not only listen with your ears, but to listen with your heart.
7. Affection and Kindness
How often do you say "please" or "thank you" or give your spouse an unexpected kiss? Unfortunately, some married couples forget that being kind and affectionate to one another are keys to a successful marriage.
8. Sharing Household and Child Rearing Responsibilities.
One of the main reasons couples fight is conflict over who is doing what around the house. Chores and child care are not the sole responsibility of your wife. She shouldn't have to ask you to do your share around the house.
9. A Day Off Now and Then
Don't fuss about your wife taking a day off several times a month. This means that she will be free from worrying about what is happening with the kids, the house, the pets, and you. She deserves this break in her schedule and she needs to provide it for herself to be emotionally and physically healthy.
10. Commitment to Take Care of Yourself Both Physically and Emotionally
Many men are notorious for not taking care of themselves when it comes to health issues. This isn't fair to your wife. She is your lover not your mother. Take responsibility for your own health concerns.
source: http://marriage.about.com/od/marriagetoolbox/tp/wiveswant.htm, 07/02/09 1:20PM
Note that these are "wants" -- not emotional needs. As individuals, we are each responsible for filling our own emotional needs.
We believe that the four basic emotional needs are the need to be loved and to love; the need to belong; the need for a good self-image; and the need for autonomy.
1. Telling Her Daily That She is Loved
Everyone wants to be affirmed. Everyone wants to know they are loved. The best ways to say "I love you" are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.
2. Understanding and Forgiveness
There will be days when your wife will make mistakes or when she will be difficult to be around. No one is perfect. She both wants and deserves your willingness to understand and forgive her. Remember that no relationship can be sustained without forgiveness.
3. Conversation
Don't let your conversations with your wife dwindle to nothing but talk about your kids, your jobs, and the weather. If that happens, your marriage relationship could be in real trouble.
4. Willingness to Make Time for Her and Your Children
Having quality time with your wife and kids isn't something that just happens. You have to make it happen by not only making the plans but by following through. Time with those you love has to be a high priority for you.
5. Saying "Yes" More Than Saying "No"
Habitual negative responses to your wife and kids can push them away from you. Think twice before saying "no" and you will be surprised at how saying "yes" can improve your relationships.
6. Listening Well
It's really disheartening for a wife to share her thoughts and feelings with her mate and then realize that he didn't actually listen to her. Your wife wants you to not only listen with your ears, but to listen with your heart.
7. Affection and Kindness
How often do you say "please" or "thank you" or give your spouse an unexpected kiss? Unfortunately, some married couples forget that being kind and affectionate to one another are keys to a successful marriage.
8. Sharing Household and Child Rearing Responsibilities.
One of the main reasons couples fight is conflict over who is doing what around the house. Chores and child care are not the sole responsibility of your wife. She shouldn't have to ask you to do your share around the house.
9. A Day Off Now and Then
Don't fuss about your wife taking a day off several times a month. This means that she will be free from worrying about what is happening with the kids, the house, the pets, and you. She deserves this break in her schedule and she needs to provide it for herself to be emotionally and physically healthy.
10. Commitment to Take Care of Yourself Both Physically and Emotionally
Many men are notorious for not taking care of themselves when it comes to health issues. This isn't fair to your wife. She is your lover not your mother. Take responsibility for your own health concerns.
source: http://marriage.about.com/od/marriagetoolbox/tp/wiveswant.htm, 07/02/09 1:20PM
Top 10 Things Husbands Want From Their Wives
In no particular order, here are ten things that many husbands want from their wives.
Note that these are "wants" -- not emotional needs. As individuals, we are each responsible for filling our own emotional needs.
We believe that the four basic emotional needs are the need to be loved and to love; the need to belong; the need for a good self-image; and the need for autonomy.
1. Believe in His Capabilities
Many men believe it is important for them to protect and provide for those they love. Let him know that you believe in his talents and skills and are supportive of him.
2. Understanding
One of the ways you can both tell and show your husband that you want to understand him is by making a commitment to daily dialogue with him. Daily dialogue only takes 20 minutes out of your day. Isn't your husband worth 20 minutes each day?
3. Affirmation of His Accomplishments
Most guys like to be patted on the back. Compliment your husband often. Just don't over do it with sicky sweet oozes of how great he is. That type of affirmation will backfire.
4. Acceptance
Many husbands are hurt and angered when their wives try to change them. Realize that the only person that you can change is yourself.
5. Less Chatter
If your husband is tired, or involved with a project, and you really want to talk to him about something, get to the point. If he wants the details of the topic, he will ask for them.
6. Affection
Hold your husband's hand in public, leave a message of love on his voice mail, massage his shoulders, give him an unexpected kiss. Men like to be romanced too!
7. Respect
Show respect for your husband by not making negative comments about his thoughts and opinions, by being considerate of his plans, and by avoiding the "eye roll" when listening to him.
8. Free Time
Most everyone has a desire for some quiet time alone, and time to re-energize, regroup, and reconnect. When your husband first gets home from work, allow him some free time to unwind. Don't over-schedule his days off with projects around the house.
9. Trust
Trust is vital in the success of a marriage. If you are having doubts about your husband and find it difficult to trust him, seek counseling and not spying.
10. To Be a Companion
Hopefully, you can say that your husband is not only your lover, but also your friend. Staying friends and companions through the years requires that you find ways to make time together and to do things together.
Source: http://marriage.about.com/od/marriagetoolbox/tp/husbandswant.htm, 07/02/09 1:12PM
Note that these are "wants" -- not emotional needs. As individuals, we are each responsible for filling our own emotional needs.
We believe that the four basic emotional needs are the need to be loved and to love; the need to belong; the need for a good self-image; and the need for autonomy.
1. Believe in His Capabilities
Many men believe it is important for them to protect and provide for those they love. Let him know that you believe in his talents and skills and are supportive of him.
2. Understanding
One of the ways you can both tell and show your husband that you want to understand him is by making a commitment to daily dialogue with him. Daily dialogue only takes 20 minutes out of your day. Isn't your husband worth 20 minutes each day?
3. Affirmation of His Accomplishments
Most guys like to be patted on the back. Compliment your husband often. Just don't over do it with sicky sweet oozes of how great he is. That type of affirmation will backfire.
4. Acceptance
Many husbands are hurt and angered when their wives try to change them. Realize that the only person that you can change is yourself.
5. Less Chatter
If your husband is tired, or involved with a project, and you really want to talk to him about something, get to the point. If he wants the details of the topic, he will ask for them.
6. Affection
Hold your husband's hand in public, leave a message of love on his voice mail, massage his shoulders, give him an unexpected kiss. Men like to be romanced too!
7. Respect
Show respect for your husband by not making negative comments about his thoughts and opinions, by being considerate of his plans, and by avoiding the "eye roll" when listening to him.
8. Free Time
Most everyone has a desire for some quiet time alone, and time to re-energize, regroup, and reconnect. When your husband first gets home from work, allow him some free time to unwind. Don't over-schedule his days off with projects around the house.
9. Trust
Trust is vital in the success of a marriage. If you are having doubts about your husband and find it difficult to trust him, seek counseling and not spying.
10. To Be a Companion
Hopefully, you can say that your husband is not only your lover, but also your friend. Staying friends and companions through the years requires that you find ways to make time together and to do things together.
Source: http://marriage.about.com/od/marriagetoolbox/tp/husbandswant.htm, 07/02/09 1:12PM
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Today Joke
| I am very pleased to inform all visitors that this blog is welcome to post all your good idea, poems, joke, and any knowledge. You can send it with your name or address (additional information) via email: khmer_itech@hotmail.com. Once I received your email, it is be posted on my blog as soon. Thanks for dropping by on my blog. |
Monday, June 22, 2009
លោកយាយក្មេងម្លេះតា Poem (by Sin Daravut)
| I am very pleased to inform all visitors that this blog is welcome to post all your good idea, poems, joke, and any knowledge. You can send it with your name or address (additional information) via email: khmer_itech@hotmail.com. Once I received your email, it is be posted on my blog as soon. Thanks for dropping by on my blog. |
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Romantic Story :: The Salty Coffee
He met her at a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him.
At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, and she thought to herself, "Please, let me go home..."
Suddenly he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee." Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red but still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously, "Why you have this hobby?" He replied, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there." While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home... Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family.
That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, and then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.
After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said, "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life's lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything... Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth, I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste... But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."
Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her, "What's the taste of salty coffee?" She replied, "It's sweet."
Pass this to everyone because love is not to forget but to forgive, not to see but understand, not to hear but to listen, not to let go but HOLD ON!!!!
At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, and she thought to herself, "Please, let me go home..."
Suddenly he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee." Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red but still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously, "Why you have this hobby?" He replied, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there." While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home... Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family.
That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, and then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.
After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said, "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life's lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything... Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth, I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste... But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."
Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her, "What's the taste of salty coffee?" She replied, "It's sweet."
Pass this to everyone because love is not to forget but to forgive, not to see but understand, not to hear but to listen, not to let go but HOLD ON!!!!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Inspirational Love Story :: A Gift of Love
The passengers on the bus watched sympathetically as the attractive young woman with the white cane made her way carefully up the steps. She paid the driver and, using her hands to feel the location of the seats, walked down the aisle and found the seat he'd told her was empty. Then she settled in, placed her briefcase on her lap and rested her cane against her leg.
It had been a year since Susan, 34, became blind. Due to a medical misdiagnosis she had been rendered sightless, and she was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness, anger, frustration and self-pity. And all she had to cling to was her husband, Mark.
Mark was an Air Force officer and he loved Susan with all his heart. When she first lost her sight, he watched her sink into despair and was determined to help his wife gain the strength and confidence she needed to become independent again.
Finally, Susan felt ready to return to her job, but how would she get there? She used to take the bus, but was now too frightened to get around the city by herself. Mark volunteered to drive her to work each day, even though they worked at opposite ends of the city. At first, this comforted Susan, and fulfilled Mark's need to protect his sightless wife who was so insecure about performing the slightest task.
Soon, however, Mark realized the arrangement wasn't working. Susan is going to have to start taking the bus again, he admitted to himself. But she was still so fragile, so angry - how would she react? Just as he predicted, Susan was horrified at the idea of taking the bus again.
"I'm blind!", she responded bitterly. "How am I supposed to know where I am going? I feel like you're abandoning me."
Mark's heart broke to hear these words, but he knew what had to be done. He promised Susan that each morning and evening he would ride the bus with her, for as long as it took, until she got the hang of it. And that is exactly what happened. For two solid weeks, Mark, military uniform and all, accompanied Susan to and from work each day.
He taught her how to rely on her other senses, specifically her hearing, to determine where she was and how to adapt to her new environment. He helped her befriend the bus drivers who could watch out for her, and save her a seat.
Finally, Susan decided that she was ready to try the trip on her own. Monday morning arrived, and before she left, she threw her arms around Mark, her temporary bus-riding companion, her husband, and her best friend. Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude for his loyalty, his patience, And his love. She said good-bye, and for the first time, they went their separate ways. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday... Each day on her own went perfectly, and Susan had never felt better. She was doing it! She was going to work all by herself.
On Friday morning, Susan took the bus to work as usual. As she was paying the fare to exit the bus, the driver said, "Boy, I sure do envy you." Susan wasn't sure if the driver was speaking to her or not. After all, who on earth would ever envy a blind woman who had struggled just to find the courage to live for the past year? Curious, she asked the driver, "Why do you say that you envy me?"
The driver responded, "It must feel good to be taken care of and protected like you are." Susan had no idea what the driver was talking about, and again asked, "What do you mean?"
The driver answered, "You know, every morning for the past week, a fine-looking gentleman in a military uniform has been standing across the corner watching you as you get off the bus. He makes sure you cross the street safely and he watches until you enter your office building.
Then he blows you a kiss, gives you a little salute and walks away. You are one lucky lady." Tears of happiness poured down Susan's cheeks. For although she couldn't physically see him, she had always felt Mark's presence. She was lucky, so lucky, for he had given her a gift more powerful than sight, a gift she didn't need to see to believe - the gift of love that can bring light where there is darkness.
I wish you guys live happily forever after with the one you love...
It had been a year since Susan, 34, became blind. Due to a medical misdiagnosis she had been rendered sightless, and she was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness, anger, frustration and self-pity. And all she had to cling to was her husband, Mark.
Mark was an Air Force officer and he loved Susan with all his heart. When she first lost her sight, he watched her sink into despair and was determined to help his wife gain the strength and confidence she needed to become independent again.
Finally, Susan felt ready to return to her job, but how would she get there? She used to take the bus, but was now too frightened to get around the city by herself. Mark volunteered to drive her to work each day, even though they worked at opposite ends of the city. At first, this comforted Susan, and fulfilled Mark's need to protect his sightless wife who was so insecure about performing the slightest task.
Soon, however, Mark realized the arrangement wasn't working. Susan is going to have to start taking the bus again, he admitted to himself. But she was still so fragile, so angry - how would she react? Just as he predicted, Susan was horrified at the idea of taking the bus again.
"I'm blind!", she responded bitterly. "How am I supposed to know where I am going? I feel like you're abandoning me."
Mark's heart broke to hear these words, but he knew what had to be done. He promised Susan that each morning and evening he would ride the bus with her, for as long as it took, until she got the hang of it. And that is exactly what happened. For two solid weeks, Mark, military uniform and all, accompanied Susan to and from work each day.
He taught her how to rely on her other senses, specifically her hearing, to determine where she was and how to adapt to her new environment. He helped her befriend the bus drivers who could watch out for her, and save her a seat.
Finally, Susan decided that she was ready to try the trip on her own. Monday morning arrived, and before she left, she threw her arms around Mark, her temporary bus-riding companion, her husband, and her best friend. Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude for his loyalty, his patience, And his love. She said good-bye, and for the first time, they went their separate ways. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday... Each day on her own went perfectly, and Susan had never felt better. She was doing it! She was going to work all by herself.
On Friday morning, Susan took the bus to work as usual. As she was paying the fare to exit the bus, the driver said, "Boy, I sure do envy you." Susan wasn't sure if the driver was speaking to her or not. After all, who on earth would ever envy a blind woman who had struggled just to find the courage to live for the past year? Curious, she asked the driver, "Why do you say that you envy me?"
The driver responded, "It must feel good to be taken care of and protected like you are." Susan had no idea what the driver was talking about, and again asked, "What do you mean?"
The driver answered, "You know, every morning for the past week, a fine-looking gentleman in a military uniform has been standing across the corner watching you as you get off the bus. He makes sure you cross the street safely and he watches until you enter your office building.
Then he blows you a kiss, gives you a little salute and walks away. You are one lucky lady." Tears of happiness poured down Susan's cheeks. For although she couldn't physically see him, she had always felt Mark's presence. She was lucky, so lucky, for he had given her a gift more powerful than sight, a gift she didn't need to see to believe - the gift of love that can bring light where there is darkness.
I wish you guys live happily forever after with the one you love...
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Cute Love Story :: Loving an Imperfect Person
Note: This is my favorite story.
They have been married for two years. He loves literature and often posts his work on the net, but nobody ever reads them. He is also into photography and he handles their wedding photos. He loves her very much. Likewise with her. She has a quick temper and always bullies him. He is a gentleman and always gives in to her.
Today, she's being willful again.
Her: "Why can't you be the photographer for my friend's wedding? She promised she'd pay."Him: "I don't have time that day."Her: "Humph!" Him: "Huh?"Her: "Don't have time? Write less of those novels, and you will have all the time you need."Him: "I... someone will definitely recognize my work some day." Her: "Humph! I don't care, you'll have to do it for her!" Him: "No." Her: "Just this once?" Him: "No."
Negotiation's broken. So, she gave the final warning: "Give me a Yes within three days, or else..."
First day, she "withheld" the kitchen, bathroom, computer, refrigerator, television, hi-fi... Except the double bed, to show her "benevolence".
Of course, she has to sleep on it too. He didn't mind, as he still has some cash in his pockets.
Second day, she conducted a raid and removed everything from his pockets and warned, "Seek any external help, and you bear the consequences."
He's nervous now. That night, on the bed, he begs for mercy, hoping that she'll end this state. She doesn't give a damn. No way am I giving in, whatever he says. Until he agrees.
Third day, night. On the bed. He's lying on the bed, looking to one side. She's lying on the bed, looking to the other side.
Him: "We need to talk." Her: "Unless it's about the wedding, forget it." Him: "It's something very important."
She remains silent.
Him: "Let's get a divorce." She did not believe her ears. Him: "I got to know a girl."
She's totally angry, and wanted to hit him. But she held it down, wanting to let him finish. But her eyes already felt wet. He took a photo out from his chest. Probably from his undershirt pocket, that's the only place she didn't go through yesterday. How careless.
Him: "She's a nice girl." Her tears fell.
Him: "She has a good personality too." She's heartbroken because he puts a photo of some other girl close to his heart. Him: "She says that she'll support me fully in my pursue for literature after we got married."
She's very jealous because she said the same thing in the past. Him: "She loves me truly." She wishes to sit up and scream at him "Don't I?" Him: "So, I think she won't force me to do something that I don't want to do."
She's thinking, but the rage won't subside. Him: "Want to take a look at the photo I took for her?" Her: "...!"
He brings the photo before her eyes. She's in a total rage, hits his hand away and leaves a burning slap on his face.
He sighs. She cries.He puts the photo back to his pocket. She pulls her hand back under the blanket.
He turns off the light, and sleeps. She turns on the light, and sits up. He's asleep. She lost sleep. She regrets treating him the way she treated him.
She cried again, and thought about a lot of things. She wants to wake him up. She wants to have a intimate talk with him. She doesn't want to push him anymore. She stares at his chest. She wants to see how the girl looks.
She slips the photo out. She wanted to cry and she wanted to laugh.
It's a nicely taken photo. A photo he took for her. She bends down, and kissed him on his cheek.
He smiled. He was just pretending to be asleep.
"You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."
They have been married for two years. He loves literature and often posts his work on the net, but nobody ever reads them. He is also into photography and he handles their wedding photos. He loves her very much. Likewise with her. She has a quick temper and always bullies him. He is a gentleman and always gives in to her.
Today, she's being willful again.
Her: "Why can't you be the photographer for my friend's wedding? She promised she'd pay."Him: "I don't have time that day."Her: "Humph!" Him: "Huh?"Her: "Don't have time? Write less of those novels, and you will have all the time you need."Him: "I... someone will definitely recognize my work some day." Her: "Humph! I don't care, you'll have to do it for her!" Him: "No." Her: "Just this once?" Him: "No."
Negotiation's broken. So, she gave the final warning: "Give me a Yes within three days, or else..."
First day, she "withheld" the kitchen, bathroom, computer, refrigerator, television, hi-fi... Except the double bed, to show her "benevolence".
Of course, she has to sleep on it too. He didn't mind, as he still has some cash in his pockets.
Second day, she conducted a raid and removed everything from his pockets and warned, "Seek any external help, and you bear the consequences."
He's nervous now. That night, on the bed, he begs for mercy, hoping that she'll end this state. She doesn't give a damn. No way am I giving in, whatever he says. Until he agrees.
Third day, night. On the bed. He's lying on the bed, looking to one side. She's lying on the bed, looking to the other side.
Him: "We need to talk." Her: "Unless it's about the wedding, forget it." Him: "It's something very important."
She remains silent.
Him: "Let's get a divorce." She did not believe her ears. Him: "I got to know a girl."
She's totally angry, and wanted to hit him. But she held it down, wanting to let him finish. But her eyes already felt wet. He took a photo out from his chest. Probably from his undershirt pocket, that's the only place she didn't go through yesterday. How careless.
Him: "She's a nice girl." Her tears fell.
Him: "She has a good personality too." She's heartbroken because he puts a photo of some other girl close to his heart. Him: "She says that she'll support me fully in my pursue for literature after we got married."
She's very jealous because she said the same thing in the past. Him: "She loves me truly." She wishes to sit up and scream at him "Don't I?" Him: "So, I think she won't force me to do something that I don't want to do."
She's thinking, but the rage won't subside. Him: "Want to take a look at the photo I took for her?" Her: "...!"
He brings the photo before her eyes. She's in a total rage, hits his hand away and leaves a burning slap on his face.
He sighs. She cries.He puts the photo back to his pocket. She pulls her hand back under the blanket.
He turns off the light, and sleeps. She turns on the light, and sits up. He's asleep. She lost sleep. She regrets treating him the way she treated him.
She cried again, and thought about a lot of things. She wants to wake him up. She wants to have a intimate talk with him. She doesn't want to push him anymore. She stares at his chest. She wants to see how the girl looks.
She slips the photo out. She wanted to cry and she wanted to laugh.
It's a nicely taken photo. A photo he took for her. She bends down, and kissed him on his cheek.
He smiled. He was just pretending to be asleep.
"You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Inspirational Story :: Can I Borrow $25
A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.
SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'
DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.
SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'
The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities. '
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
'Are you asleep, son?' He asked.
'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.
'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.'
The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.
'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled.
'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.
'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.' I miss you so much Daddy...
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.
It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $50 worth of your time with someone you love.
If we are gone tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.
Do you think so? Let share your time with someone you love...
Source: http://www.funnythreat.com/moral_story/can_i_borrow_25dollars.htm, 06/05/09 4:48PM
SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'
DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.
SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'
The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities. '
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
'Are you asleep, son?' He asked.
'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.
'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.'
The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.
'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled.
'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.
'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.' I miss you so much Daddy...
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.
It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $50 worth of your time with someone you love.
If we are gone tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.
Do you think so? Let share your time with someone you love...
Source: http://www.funnythreat.com/moral_story/can_i_borrow_25dollars.htm, 06/05/09 4:48PM
Love Story :: A Silent Love
From the very Begining, the girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.
Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"
As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.
After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"
The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.
The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.
One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......
The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.
During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.
With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....
The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.
With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.
When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.
Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"
As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.
After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"
The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.
The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.
One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......
The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.
During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.
With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....
The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.
With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.
When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.
ប្រពៃណីជាតិ៖ ការរៀបអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍
ប្រពៃណីជាតិ៖ តើត្រូវចងដៃកូនកំលោះកូនក្រមុំដោយអម្បោះពណ៌អ្វី?
ទំនៀមទំលាប់ប្រពៃណីខ្មែរនៅក្នុងអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ការចងដៃគឺជាកិច្ចចុងក្រោយបង្អស់នៃពិធីមង្គលការ។ ប្រជាពលរដ្ឋ ខ្មែរគ្រប់រូបទាំងចាស់ទាំងក្មេង ទីក្រុងក៏ដូចជាជនបទដែរ តែងយល់ដឹងគ្រប់ៗគ្នាអំពីការចងដៃកូនកំលោះកូនក្រមុំ នោះ គ្រាន់តែខ្លះយល់អត្ថន័យ ខ្លះមិនយល់ពីអត្ថន័យតែប៉ុណ្ណោះ។ បច្ចុប្បន្ននេះពិធីអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ខ្មែរហាក់ដូចជា មានភាពខុសគ្នាខ្លះរវាងប្រជាពលរដ្ឋនៅតាមជនបទ និង នៅតាមទីក្រុងអាស្រ័យលើពេលវេលា។
១. អាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍នៅតាមជនបទស្រែចំការ ច្រើនប្រព្រឹត្តទៅ៣ថ្ងៃ
ឧទាហរណ៍៖
+ ថ្ងៃទី១៖ ថ្ងៃអង្គារ វេលាម៉ោង៥ល្ងាច ជាថ្ងៃចូលរោងពេលនោះអាចារ្យធ្វើពិធីសែនក្រុងពលី សុំម្ចាស់ទឹកម្ចាស់ដី ហើយនិមន្តព្រះសង្ឃចំរើនព្រះបរិត្តយកសិរីសួស្តីដល់កូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំ។
+ ថ្ងៃទី២៖ ថ្ងៃពុធ វេលាម៉ោង៧ព្រឹក ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់មេបា ម៉ោង១ ឬ ម៉ោង២ កាត់សក់ ចំរើនកេសាកូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី លុះដល់ម៉ោង៧យប់ ចងដៃកូនស្រី ម៉ោង៧និង២០នាទី ចងដៃ កូនប្រុស ម៉ោង១០ និង ម៉ោង១១ ជុំវេលា ជៀវខាន់ស្លា ធ្វើធ្មេញបំពេញសក្សណ៍។
+ ថ្ងៃទី៣៖ ថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍ វេលាម៉ោង៥ ឬ ម៉ោង៥និង៣០នាទី ឬ ម៉ោង៥ព្រឹក ចងដៃកូន កំលោះ និង កូនក្រមុំ រួមទាំងពីរនាក់ផ្ទឹមបង្ហើយ ទើបកូនកំលោះតោងជាយស្បៃតាមកូនក្រមុំ ទៅក្នុងផ្សំដំណេក។
២. អាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍នៅទីក្រុង ច្រើនប្រព្រឹត្តទៅ១យប់១ព្រឹក ឬ ភាគច្រើនតែ១ព្រឹកប៉ុណ្ណោះ
ឧទាហរណ៍១៖
+ ការរៀបអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ ១យប់១ព្រឹក ថ្ងៃពុធនិងថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍៖
- ថ្ងៃពុធវេលាម៉ោង៣ សែនក្រុងពលី សុំម្ចាស់ទឹកម្ចាស់ដី ម៉ោង៥ ចំរើនព្រះបរិត្ត ម៉ោង៦ ជុំវេលា ជៀវខាន់ស្លា ធ្វើធ្មេញបំពេញលក្សណ៍។
- ថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍វេលាម៉ោង៧ ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់លោកមេបា ម៉ោង៩ កាត់សក់ ម៉ោង១១ទៅ ម៉ោង១២ សំពះ ផ្ទឹមចងដៃបង្ហើយ។
ឧទាហរណ៍២៖
+ ការរៀបអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍តែ ១ព្រឹក ថ្ងៃពុធ វេលាម៉ោង៧ព្រឹក ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់លោកមេ បា ម៉ោង៩ កាត់សក់ ម៉ោង១១ទៅម៉ោង១២ សំពះផ្ទឹមចងដៃបង្ហើយ។ សកម្មភាពអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ដូចរៀបរាប់មកដោយសង្ខបខាងលើនេះ បានបញ្ជាក់ឲ្យយើងឃើញជាច្រើននូវបែបបទនៃការចងដៃកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំក្នុងពិធីមង្គលការខ្មែរ។
សំនួរ៖ តើពិធីចងដៃមានអត្ថន័យយ៉ាងណាខ្លះ ចំពោះជីវិតអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ ទើបបុព្វាចារ្យខ្មែរ លោកនាំធ្វើដោយ ចាំបាច់បំផុតយ៉ាងនេះ?
ចំលើយ៖ ដូចពាក្យចាស់លោកបានពោលទុកមកថា មន្តអាគនម៍ផ្សំនិងឧវកិច្ច ឯពិធីមង្គលការ ខ្មែរច្រើនប្រើសភាវគតិ ដោយឧបមាវិធីជាច្រើនអន្លើ។ អម្បោះគឺជាវត្ថុតូចឆ្មារ ហើយផុយបំផុត បើយើងពិនិត្យមើលទៅលើរូបភាពជាក់ស្តែង របស់វាក៏ពិតមែនហើយ ប៉ុន្តែបុព្វាចារ្យខ្មែរបានយកអម្បោះគួបផ្សំនិងម្លូរស្លា មេបាចាស់ទុំគឺមាតាបិតាដែលមានជីវិត រស់នៅសព្វថ្ងៃនិងជីដូន ជីតា ញាតិការទាំង៧សន្តានដែលបានស្លាប់បាត់បង់ជីវិតទៅកាន់លោកខាងមុខហើយ មក ធ្វើជាចំណងអនុស្សាវរីយ៍ដ៏ជាប់បំផុតសម្រាប់ចងមនោសញ្ចេតនាកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំទាំងពីរ ឲ្យនៅជាប់ជាមួយ គ្នាដ៏រាបអស់មួយជីវិតរៀងទៅ។
លក្ខណៈអម្បោះចងដៃ៖
បច្ចុប្បន្ននេះនៅទីក្រុងភ្នំពេញក៏ដូចជានៅតាមខេត្ត-ក្រុងនានាភាគច្រើន គេនិយមយកអម្បោះ ពណ៌ក្រហមមកចងដៃ កូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំអស់ទៅហើយ ទាំងលោកអាចារ្យទៀតក៏មិន បានគិតដល់បញ្ហានេះដែរ។ យើងដឹងហើយថា វប្បធម៌ប្រពៃណីទំនៀមទំលាប់គឺជាអត្តសញ្ញាណដ៏សំខាន់របស់ជាតិសាសន៍នីមួយៗ គឺជាព្រលឹងរបស់ជាតិរហូត ដល់មានពាក្យស្លោកពោលថា វប្បធម៌រលត់ជាតិរលាយ វប្បធម៌ពណ្ណរាយ ជាតិថ្កើងថ្កាន ក៏មានន័យស្មើគ្នា នឹងពាក្យ ថា ប្រពៃណីរលត់ជាតិរលាយ ប្រពៃណីពណ្ណរាយ ជាតិថ្កើងថ្កាន។ ន័យនេះខ្ញុំចង់ និយាយអំពីពណ៌សអម្បោះចងដៃ។ ខ្មែរយើងពីបុរាណ លោកប្រើអម្បោះពណ៌សដូចមាន ឃ្លាសម្អាងនៅក្នុងក្បួនអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍របស់អ្នកឧកញ៉ាមហា វិនិច្ឆ័យនៅ ក៏ដូចអ្នកឧកញ៉ាមហា មន្រ្តីញ៉ិក នូវទំព័រទី១៩៣ បន្ទាត់ទី៦ ថា អម្បោះស សមគួរគាប់ឧត្តម ដូចល្អស សុវណ្ណា កកាន់ លើកឡើង ថ្កល់ថ្កើងថ្លៃថ្លា ចូរចងហត្ថាឲ្យអ្នកសុខសាន្ត។ល។
ឆ្លងតាមរយៈឃ្លាសម្អាងដូចបានពោលខាងលើនេះ យើងឃើញថា បុរាណលោកយកអម្បោះពណ៌សមកចងដៃកូន កំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំ ដើម្បីសុំសិរីសួស្តីជ័យមង្គល។
ការវិភាគទៅលើពណ៌អម្បោះ៖
ពាក្យថា ពណ៌អម្បោះ ពាក្យនេះជាវិសេលនបុព្វបទកម្មធារយសមាសមានពីរបទគឺ ពណ៌១ បទ និង អម្បោះ១បទ។ អម្បោះគឺជាបទនាម ឯពណ៌គឺជាបទគុណ។ ពាក្យទាំងពីរនេះសូម លើកយកតែពណ៌មួយមកបកស្រាយដូចតទៅ៖
ពណ៌គឺជាពាក្យសំស្រ្កឹត មកពីពាក្យបាលីថា វណ្ណៈ លោកផ្លាស់អក្សរ វ ខាងដើមទៅជា ព ឯ ណ្ណៈ ផ្លាស់ជា ណ៌ តាមក្បួនព្យញ្ជនាទេសៈ។ វណ្ណៈ ឬ ពណ៌ នេះ ប្រែថា សម្បុរ ពន្លឺ រស្មី ភេទ ថ្នាក់ វង្សពូជ ពូជវង្ស របស់មនុស្ស។ តាមលទ្ធិព្រាហ្មណ៍ គេចែកពូជរបស់មនុស្សជា៤ ថ្នាក់ទី១ ព្រាហ្មណៈថា ដើមកំណើតដំបូងបំផុតកើតអំពីព្រះឱស្ន ព្រះព្រហ្ម ព្រហ្មតម្រូវឲ្យជាម្ចាស់ សាសនា មានមុខការខាងបង្រៀនតែប្រៀនប្រដៅវេទមន្តវិជ្ជាផ្សេងៗ មានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យស្លៀក ដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ស ទី២ ខន្តិយ ឬ ក្សត្រិយ កើតអំពីព្រះពាហា (ដៃ) របស់ព្រាហ្ម មានមុខងារខាងគ្រប់គ្រងរក្សាប្រទេសមានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យប្រើសំពត់ពណ៌ក្រហម ថៃស្យៈ ឬ វេស្ស កើតអំពីព្រះពុទ្ធឧរុរបស់ព្រហ្មទណ្ឌ មានមុខងារខាងធ្វើកិច្ចការខ្ពង់ខ្ពស់ចុះរងអំពីខកិត្តិយស មក ឬ កិច្ចការធម្មតា មានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យស្លៀកដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ខៀវ លឿង សូត្រ ឬ សុទ្ទៈ កើតអំពីព្រះបាទរបស់ព្រហ្ម មានមុខងារខាងស៊ីឈ្នួល ឬការថយថោកផ្សេងៗមានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យ ស្លៀកដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ខ្មៅ។
ដោយហេតុនេះទើបហៅពួករបស់មនុស្សទាំង៤ថ្នាក់នេះថា វណ្ណៈ ឬ ពណ៌ ដោយសំដៅពណ៌ សំពត់ដណ្ណប់នេះឯង លុះចំណេរកាលខាងថ្នាក់វង្សពូជ ពូជវង្សតរៀងមក។
រឿងពណ៌ទាំង៤នេះ សូមលើកយកតែពណ៌ពីរមកនិយាយ គឺពណ៌ក្រហម និងពណ៌ស។
១. ពណ៌ក្រហម ជាពណ៌ម្យ៉ាងដែលបញ្ជាក់អំពីភាពអង់អាចក្លាហាន មោះមុតដាច់ខាតឥតរាថយ មានគុណ២យ៉ាងគឺ៖ គុណសម្បត្តិ និង គុណវិបត្តិ។
អធិប្បាយ៖
ក. គុណសម្បត្តិ៖
ជាពណ៌ដែលស្ថិតនៅក្នុងត្រកូលអ្នកគ្រប់គ្រងប្រទេសដាច់ខាត មោះមុត អង់អាច ក្លាហាន ឧត្តមភេទ ភេទ អ្នកបួស ប្រសើរថ្លៃថ្លា លះបង់ខ្ពស់ ទង់ជ័យ ព្រះអរហត្ថ។ល។
ខ. គុណវិបត្តិ៖ ពណ៌ក្រហម តំណាងអោយឈាមដែលហូរចេញពីខ្លួន នៅក្នុងធម៌ព្រះអភិធម្ម លោកសំដែងអំពីពណ៌ក្រហមដែលធ្វើឲ្យទឹកចិត្តប្រែប្រួល បាត់ភាពថ្លាបរិសុទ្ធ សេចក្តីថា នៅក្នុងខ្លួនយើងមានទឹកមួយទូកដៃសម្រាប់រក្សាចិត្តដែលអាស្រ័យនៅក្នុងបេះដូង។ ទឹកនោម មានលក្ខណៈថ្លាល្អបរិសុទ្ធណាស់ ដ៏រាបណាមិនមានអារម្មណ៍ដ៏សៅហ្មងចូលទៅពីខាងក្រៅ ទេ។ ប៉ុន្តែបើភ្នែក ត្រចៀក ច្រមុះ អណ្តាត កាយ និង ចិត្តខ្លួនឯងនាំអារម្មណ៍ដែលជាលោភៈ ទោសៈ មោហៈ អកុសល ពីក្រៅចូលទៅក្នុងនោះ ធ្វើឲ្យទឹកបរិសុទ្ធមួយទូកដៃ លាយទៅជាក្រហមបាន ហើយស្តែងចេញមកវិញតាមសរសៃរសព្វសាព៌ាង្គកាយ ពិសេសគឺសណ្ឋានមុខ និង ច្រមុះរបស់យើងឡើងឈាមក្រហម ដែលធ្វើឲ្យកើតទៅជាជម្លោះទាស់ទែងកាប់សម្លាប់គ្នាឡើងដ៏សាហាវឃោរឃៅបំផុត។ ដូច្នេះហើយទើបជនជាតិខ្លះនៅក្នុងលោកមានចិន យួន ជាដើម គេយកពណ៌ក្រហមធ្វើជាគ្រឿងសក្ការៈគោរពបូជារបស់គេដូចជាអាទិ៍ ក្រដាសកុងម៉ា ដែលបិទភ្ជាប់ទៅនឹងក្តារហឹងជាភស្តុតាងស្រាប់។ ដើម្បីបញ្ជាក់ឲ្យឃើញលទ្ធផលកាន់តែ ច្បាស់ក្នុងរបបខ្មែរក្រហម គេកំណត់យកទង់ជាតិពណ៌ក្រហមដែលជានិមិត្តរូបនៃលទ្ធផល ផ្តាច់ការ និមិត្តរូបនៃឈាម ភាពអង់អាចក្លាហាន កាប់សម្លាប់ កាចសាហាវ ឃោរឃៅ ហិង្សារ សង្រ្គាម រហូតដល់មានចម្រៀង គេច្រៀងទុកជាភស្តុតាងថា បទទី១-ទង់ក្រហមបក់ឡើងរវិច ប្តេជ្ញាកំទេចរដ្ឋអំណាចជិះជាន់។ល។ បទទី២-ឈាមក្រហមច្រាលស្រោចស្រពក្រុងកម្ពុជា មាតុភូមិ។ល។ បទទី៣-ឈាមក្រហមឆ្អៅក្រាលនៅលើប្រថពី ឈាមដែលពលីរំដោះអស់ ប្រជាជន ឈាមកម្មករ-កសិករ បញ្ញាជន ឈាមយុវជន ព្រះសង្ឃហើយនិងនារី ឈាមកួច អណ្ណែតត្រសែតលើមេឃា ប្រែក្លាយជាទង់ក្រហម បដិវត្តន៍។ល។ ប៉ុណ្ណោះជាដើម បញ្ជាក់ថា ពណ៌ក្រហមមានគុណសម្បត្តិ និង គុណវិបត្តិដូច្នេះឯង។
២. ពណ៌ស ជាពណ៌ម៉្យាងដែលបញ្ជាក់ពីភាពស្អាតស្អំ មានសច្ចៈធម៌ យុត្តិធម៌ សង្គហៈធម៌ ជួយសង្រ្គោះដល់អ្នកដទៃដែលកំពុងមានសេចក្តីទុក្ខលំបាក មានសន្តិភាព មានខន្តី សេចក្តី អត់ធន់ សោរច្ចៈ សេចក្តីស្ងប់ស្ងៀម មានគុណ២យ៉ាងដែរគឺ៖
អធិប្បាយ៖
ក. គុណសម្បត្តិ៖ ជាពណ៌តំណាងឲ្យការជួយសង្រ្គោះដូចជាព្រះមុនីឥសី ស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ជួយ ប្រស់សត្វឲ្យរស់រានមានជីវិតឡើងវិញ។ គ្រូពេទ្យស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ជួយសង្រ្គោះមនុស្សជាជំងឺឲ្យជាសះស្បើយឡើងវិញ។ លោកអាចារ្យ តាជី ដូនជី សីលវត្ត សីលវត្តី ស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ដើម្បីរក្សាសីលចម្រើន សមាជិកកម្មដ្ឋាន និង វិបស្សនាកម្មដ្ឋាន លះបង់នូវកាយទុច្ច រិត វចីទុច្ចរិត សាងសន្សំនូវកុសលឲ្យកើតចម្រើនរុងរឿងឡើង។ ម៉្យាងទៀត ពណ៌ស តំណាង ឲ្យធម៌របស់ទេព្តា ដូចមាន ពុទ្ធភាសិតដែល ព្រះពុទ្ធទ្រង់សំដែងទុកមកថា ហិរិឱត្តប្បសម្បន្នា សុក្កធម្មសមា ហិតាសន្តោ សប្បវិសាលោកា ទេវធម្មាតិ វុច្ចរេ។
ប្រែថា៖
ពួកសប្បុរសមានសន្តានស្ងប់ បរិបូណ៍ដោយហិរិនិងឱត្តប្បៈ មានស្មារតីតម្កល់មាំ បណ្ឌិតទាំង ឡាយហៅថា ទេវធម៌ ក្នុងលោក។ ហិរិនិងឱត្តប្បៈទាំងពីរនេះជាលោកបាលធំ ធម៌ជួយរក្សាសត្វលោក និងពិភពលោក ឲ្យគង់វង់ មិនឲ្យវិនាសអន្តរាយទៅ។ ហិរិ គឺសេចក្តីខ្មាស់អំពើអាក្រក់ (ខ្មាសបាប) ឱត្តប្ប គឺសេចក្តីខ្លាច អំពើអាក្រក់ (ខ្មាសបាប) ធម៌ទាំងពីរនេះជាជន្ទល់ សម្រាប់ទ្រសីលមិនឲ្យបាត់បង់ កាលបើ សីលធម៌មាននៅដរាបណា ហើយមនុស្សសត្វតែងបានសុខចម្រើនសន្តិភាពដរាបនោះឯង។ ម៉្យាងទៀតបើពិនិត្យទៅលើឆព្វណ្ណរង្សីទាំង៦ពណ៌របស់ព្រះពុទ្ធជាម្ចាស់វិញ ពណ៌ក្រហមគឺជាពណ៌ដែលរំលឹកដល់ព្រះពោធិសត្វកាលទ្រង់កើតជាបទុមបណ្ឌិតមាននៅក្នុងចម្រៀងដាក់ទង់ ព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនា ដែលជាព្រះរាជនិពន្ធរបស់សម្តេចព្រះសង្ឍរាជួន ណាតថា៖
រស្មីក្រហមនោះណា កាលដែលមាតា ពស់ខាំស្លាប់ពិត បទុមស៊ូប្តូរជីវិត កាត់បេះដូងបិតធ្វើថ្នាំ មាតា។ ឯពណ៌សក៏រំលឹកដល់ព្រះពោធិសត្វកាលទ្រង់កើតជាព្រះវេស្សន្ត មានឃ្លាក្នុងចម្រៀង បទដាក់ទង់ ព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាថា៖
រស្មីពណ៌សសុទ្ធសាធ កាលដែលព្រះបាទវេស្សន្តរក្សត្រា ឲ្យដំរីសសោភាដល់ព្រាហ្មណ៍ ប្រាថ្នាយកពោធិញ្ញាណ។ បើយើងពិនិត្យទៅលើពណ៌ក្រហមនិងពណ៌សដែលមាននៅក្នុង ឆព្វណ្ណរង្សីទាំង៦ ពណ៌របស់ព្រះពុទ្ធនោះ យើងអាចឃើញថា ពណ៌ទាំងពីរមានអត្ថន័យគួរឲ្យ យកបានដូចគ្នា។ ប៉ុន្តែបើយើងពិនិត្យទៅលើអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិវិញនោះ យើងឃើញថា ក្រហមជាពណ៌ដែលចិននិងយួនគេសន្មតថា ជាទីគោរពចំពោះកុងម៉ា របស់គេទៅហើយ ឯពណ៌ស គឺជាពណ៌ដែលខ្មែរធ្លាប់ប្រើអម្បោះចងដៃតាំងពីយូរលង់ណាស់មកហើយ និង ក្លាយទៅជាអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិយើងយ៉ាងពិតប្រាកដ។ មួយវិញទៀត តាមទស្សនៈ ខ្ញុំ បាទអ្នកសរសេរផ្ទាល់ចង់ជម្រាបថា បើកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំជាប់ខ្សែចិនផងខ្មែរផងគួរណាស់តែចងដៃអម្បោះពីរប្រភេទគឺសផងក្រហមផង បើខ្មែរសុទ្ធគួរចងអម្បោះពណ៌សសុទ្ធ បើចិនសុទ្ធ យួនសុទ្ធ គួរចងអម្បោះក្រហមសុទ្ធ ធ្វើយ៉ាងនេះ គឺដើម្បីរក្សាអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ ជាតិរបស់យើងរៀងៗខ្លួន ប៉ុន្តែមិនគួរប្រកាន់ជាតិសាន៍នោះឡើយ។
យោងតាមការវិភាគខាងលើ អាចឲ្យយើងធ្វើសេចក្តីសន្និដ្ឋានបានថា ចងដៃអម្បោះពណ៌ក្រហមមានន័យត្រឹមតែគោរពចំពោះព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាមួយប៉ុណ្ណោះ បាត់អត្តសញ្ញាណ របស់ជាតិ បើចងអម្បោះពណ៌ស គោរពព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាផង គោរពអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិ ផង។ ដូចក្នុងសេចក្តីសន្និដ្ឋាន ខ្ញុំសូមអញ្ជើញអស់លោក អ្នកជាជនជាតិខ្មែរទាំងអស់ មេត្តា បែរមកចងដៃកូនប្រុស-កូនស្រីដោយអម្បោះពណ៌សវិញ ទើបឈ្មោះថាគោរពទៅតាមទំនៀម ទំលាប់ប្រពៃណីខ្មែរជួយថែរក្សានូវអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិយើងឲ្យបានគង់វង្ស និង ជាអ្នក មានកតញ្ញូតាចំពោះបុព្វបុរសខ្មែរ សមតាមសង្គហៈធម៌ទាំង៥យ៉ាង របស់កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ចំពោះអ្នកមានគុណគឺ៖
១. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា មាតាបិតាបានចិញ្ចឹមអញតាំងពីតូចរហូតមកដល់ប៉ុណ្ណេះ ឥឡូវគាត់ចាស់ជរាហើយ អញត្រូវចិញ្ចឹមលោកវិញ។
២. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា បើមាតាបិតាមានកិច្ចការធ្ងន់ អញត្រូវបញ្ឈប់កិច្ចការរបស់អញ សិន ហើយទៅជួយធ្វើកិច្ចការលោកវិញ។
៣. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា អញត្រូវថែរក្សា ការពារវង្សត្រកូលរបស់ខ្លួនឲ្យបានគង់វង្ស មិនត្រូវនិយាយសំដីណាមួយ ឬ ធ្វើអាកប្បកិរិយាណាមួយដែលធ្វើឲ្យថោកទាប ដល់វង្សត្រកូលជាតិសាសន៍របស់ខ្លួនឡើយ។
៤. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា អញត្រូវធ្វើខ្លួនឲ្យសមជាអ្នកទទួលកេរ្តិ៍មរតករបស់មាតាបិតា។
៥. លុះមាតាបិតាធ្វើមរណកាលទៅហើយ កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវធ្វើបុណ្យឧទ្ទិសកុសលជូន លោកដោយសេចក្តីគោរព។
ដូច្នេះ ដើម្បីឲ្យសមជាត្រកូលកតញ្ញូ គួរប្រជាពលរដ្ឋខ្មែរទាំងអស់រក្សាវង្សត្រកូលរបស់ខ្មែរឲ្យ បានគង់វង្សតរៀងទៅ។
ខ. គុណវិបត្តិ៖ ជាពណ៌ដែលចុះចាញ់គេ បញ្ចប់ការតស៊ូ បញ្ចប់ពៀរវេរា។
ថ្ងៃច័ន្ទ ១១កើត ខែផល្គុន ឆ្នាំកុរ នព្វស័ក ព.ស ២៥៥១ ត្រូវនឹងថ្ងៃទី១៧ ខែមីនា ឆ្នាំ២០០៨។
(អត្ថបទដកស្រង់ពី៖ ការសែតកោះសន្តិភាពដេលី ថ្ងៃទី០១ ខែឧសភា ឆ្នាំ២០០៨)
ទំនៀមទំលាប់ប្រពៃណីខ្មែរនៅក្នុងអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ការចងដៃគឺជាកិច្ចចុងក្រោយបង្អស់នៃពិធីមង្គលការ។ ប្រជាពលរដ្ឋ ខ្មែរគ្រប់រូបទាំងចាស់ទាំងក្មេង ទីក្រុងក៏ដូចជាជនបទដែរ តែងយល់ដឹងគ្រប់ៗគ្នាអំពីការចងដៃកូនកំលោះកូនក្រមុំ នោះ គ្រាន់តែខ្លះយល់អត្ថន័យ ខ្លះមិនយល់ពីអត្ថន័យតែប៉ុណ្ណោះ។ បច្ចុប្បន្ននេះពិធីអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ខ្មែរហាក់ដូចជា មានភាពខុសគ្នាខ្លះរវាងប្រជាពលរដ្ឋនៅតាមជនបទ និង នៅតាមទីក្រុងអាស្រ័យលើពេលវេលា។
១. អាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍នៅតាមជនបទស្រែចំការ ច្រើនប្រព្រឹត្តទៅ៣ថ្ងៃ
ឧទាហរណ៍៖
+ ថ្ងៃទី១៖ ថ្ងៃអង្គារ វេលាម៉ោង៥ល្ងាច ជាថ្ងៃចូលរោងពេលនោះអាចារ្យធ្វើពិធីសែនក្រុងពលី សុំម្ចាស់ទឹកម្ចាស់ដី ហើយនិមន្តព្រះសង្ឃចំរើនព្រះបរិត្តយកសិរីសួស្តីដល់កូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំ។
+ ថ្ងៃទី២៖ ថ្ងៃពុធ វេលាម៉ោង៧ព្រឹក ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់មេបា ម៉ោង១ ឬ ម៉ោង២ កាត់សក់ ចំរើនកេសាកូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី លុះដល់ម៉ោង៧យប់ ចងដៃកូនស្រី ម៉ោង៧និង២០នាទី ចងដៃ កូនប្រុស ម៉ោង១០ និង ម៉ោង១១ ជុំវេលា ជៀវខាន់ស្លា ធ្វើធ្មេញបំពេញសក្សណ៍។
+ ថ្ងៃទី៣៖ ថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍ វេលាម៉ោង៥ ឬ ម៉ោង៥និង៣០នាទី ឬ ម៉ោង៥ព្រឹក ចងដៃកូន កំលោះ និង កូនក្រមុំ រួមទាំងពីរនាក់ផ្ទឹមបង្ហើយ ទើបកូនកំលោះតោងជាយស្បៃតាមកូនក្រមុំ ទៅក្នុងផ្សំដំណេក។
២. អាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍នៅទីក្រុង ច្រើនប្រព្រឹត្តទៅ១យប់១ព្រឹក ឬ ភាគច្រើនតែ១ព្រឹកប៉ុណ្ណោះ
ឧទាហរណ៍១៖
+ ការរៀបអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ ១យប់១ព្រឹក ថ្ងៃពុធនិងថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍៖
- ថ្ងៃពុធវេលាម៉ោង៣ សែនក្រុងពលី សុំម្ចាស់ទឹកម្ចាស់ដី ម៉ោង៥ ចំរើនព្រះបរិត្ត ម៉ោង៦ ជុំវេលា ជៀវខាន់ស្លា ធ្វើធ្មេញបំពេញលក្សណ៍។
- ថ្ងៃព្រហស្បតិ៍វេលាម៉ោង៧ ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់លោកមេបា ម៉ោង៩ កាត់សក់ ម៉ោង១១ទៅ ម៉ោង១២ សំពះ ផ្ទឹមចងដៃបង្ហើយ។
ឧទាហរណ៍២៖
+ ការរៀបអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍តែ ១ព្រឹក ថ្ងៃពុធ វេលាម៉ោង៧ព្រឹក ហែរជំនូនឡើងគាល់លោកមេ បា ម៉ោង៩ កាត់សក់ ម៉ោង១១ទៅម៉ោង១២ សំពះផ្ទឹមចងដៃបង្ហើយ។ សកម្មភាពអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ដូចរៀបរាប់មកដោយសង្ខបខាងលើនេះ បានបញ្ជាក់ឲ្យយើងឃើញជាច្រើននូវបែបបទនៃការចងដៃកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំក្នុងពិធីមង្គលការខ្មែរ។
សំនួរ៖ តើពិធីចងដៃមានអត្ថន័យយ៉ាងណាខ្លះ ចំពោះជីវិតអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ ទើបបុព្វាចារ្យខ្មែរ លោកនាំធ្វើដោយ ចាំបាច់បំផុតយ៉ាងនេះ?
ចំលើយ៖ ដូចពាក្យចាស់លោកបានពោលទុកមកថា មន្តអាគនម៍ផ្សំនិងឧវកិច្ច ឯពិធីមង្គលការ ខ្មែរច្រើនប្រើសភាវគតិ ដោយឧបមាវិធីជាច្រើនអន្លើ។ អម្បោះគឺជាវត្ថុតូចឆ្មារ ហើយផុយបំផុត បើយើងពិនិត្យមើលទៅលើរូបភាពជាក់ស្តែង របស់វាក៏ពិតមែនហើយ ប៉ុន្តែបុព្វាចារ្យខ្មែរបានយកអម្បោះគួបផ្សំនិងម្លូរស្លា មេបាចាស់ទុំគឺមាតាបិតាដែលមានជីវិត រស់នៅសព្វថ្ងៃនិងជីដូន ជីតា ញាតិការទាំង៧សន្តានដែលបានស្លាប់បាត់បង់ជីវិតទៅកាន់លោកខាងមុខហើយ មក ធ្វើជាចំណងអនុស្សាវរីយ៍ដ៏ជាប់បំផុតសម្រាប់ចងមនោសញ្ចេតនាកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំទាំងពីរ ឲ្យនៅជាប់ជាមួយ គ្នាដ៏រាបអស់មួយជីវិតរៀងទៅ។
លក្ខណៈអម្បោះចងដៃ៖
បច្ចុប្បន្ននេះនៅទីក្រុងភ្នំពេញក៏ដូចជានៅតាមខេត្ត-ក្រុងនានាភាគច្រើន គេនិយមយកអម្បោះ ពណ៌ក្រហមមកចងដៃ កូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំអស់ទៅហើយ ទាំងលោកអាចារ្យទៀតក៏មិន បានគិតដល់បញ្ហានេះដែរ។ យើងដឹងហើយថា វប្បធម៌ប្រពៃណីទំនៀមទំលាប់គឺជាអត្តសញ្ញាណដ៏សំខាន់របស់ជាតិសាសន៍នីមួយៗ គឺជាព្រលឹងរបស់ជាតិរហូត ដល់មានពាក្យស្លោកពោលថា វប្បធម៌រលត់ជាតិរលាយ វប្បធម៌ពណ្ណរាយ ជាតិថ្កើងថ្កាន ក៏មានន័យស្មើគ្នា នឹងពាក្យ ថា ប្រពៃណីរលត់ជាតិរលាយ ប្រពៃណីពណ្ណរាយ ជាតិថ្កើងថ្កាន។ ន័យនេះខ្ញុំចង់ និយាយអំពីពណ៌សអម្បោះចងដៃ។ ខ្មែរយើងពីបុរាណ លោកប្រើអម្បោះពណ៌សដូចមាន ឃ្លាសម្អាងនៅក្នុងក្បួនអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍របស់អ្នកឧកញ៉ាមហា វិនិច្ឆ័យនៅ ក៏ដូចអ្នកឧកញ៉ាមហា មន្រ្តីញ៉ិក នូវទំព័រទី១៩៣ បន្ទាត់ទី៦ ថា អម្បោះស សមគួរគាប់ឧត្តម ដូចល្អស សុវណ្ណា កកាន់ លើកឡើង ថ្កល់ថ្កើងថ្លៃថ្លា ចូរចងហត្ថាឲ្យអ្នកសុខសាន្ត។ល។
ឆ្លងតាមរយៈឃ្លាសម្អាងដូចបានពោលខាងលើនេះ យើងឃើញថា បុរាណលោកយកអម្បោះពណ៌សមកចងដៃកូន កំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំ ដើម្បីសុំសិរីសួស្តីជ័យមង្គល។
ការវិភាគទៅលើពណ៌អម្បោះ៖
ពាក្យថា ពណ៌អម្បោះ ពាក្យនេះជាវិសេលនបុព្វបទកម្មធារយសមាសមានពីរបទគឺ ពណ៌១ បទ និង អម្បោះ១បទ។ អម្បោះគឺជាបទនាម ឯពណ៌គឺជាបទគុណ។ ពាក្យទាំងពីរនេះសូម លើកយកតែពណ៌មួយមកបកស្រាយដូចតទៅ៖
ពណ៌គឺជាពាក្យសំស្រ្កឹត មកពីពាក្យបាលីថា វណ្ណៈ លោកផ្លាស់អក្សរ វ ខាងដើមទៅជា ព ឯ ណ្ណៈ ផ្លាស់ជា ណ៌ តាមក្បួនព្យញ្ជនាទេសៈ។ វណ្ណៈ ឬ ពណ៌ នេះ ប្រែថា សម្បុរ ពន្លឺ រស្មី ភេទ ថ្នាក់ វង្សពូជ ពូជវង្ស របស់មនុស្ស។ តាមលទ្ធិព្រាហ្មណ៍ គេចែកពូជរបស់មនុស្សជា៤ ថ្នាក់ទី១ ព្រាហ្មណៈថា ដើមកំណើតដំបូងបំផុតកើតអំពីព្រះឱស្ន ព្រះព្រហ្ម ព្រហ្មតម្រូវឲ្យជាម្ចាស់ សាសនា មានមុខការខាងបង្រៀនតែប្រៀនប្រដៅវេទមន្តវិជ្ជាផ្សេងៗ មានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យស្លៀក ដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ស ទី២ ខន្តិយ ឬ ក្សត្រិយ កើតអំពីព្រះពាហា (ដៃ) របស់ព្រាហ្ម មានមុខងារខាងគ្រប់គ្រងរក្សាប្រទេសមានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យប្រើសំពត់ពណ៌ក្រហម ថៃស្យៈ ឬ វេស្ស កើតអំពីព្រះពុទ្ធឧរុរបស់ព្រហ្មទណ្ឌ មានមុខងារខាងធ្វើកិច្ចការខ្ពង់ខ្ពស់ចុះរងអំពីខកិត្តិយស មក ឬ កិច្ចការធម្មតា មានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យស្លៀកដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ខៀវ លឿង សូត្រ ឬ សុទ្ទៈ កើតអំពីព្រះបាទរបស់ព្រហ្ម មានមុខងារខាងស៊ីឈ្នួល ឬការថយថោកផ្សេងៗមានបញ្ញត្តិឲ្យ ស្លៀកដណ្តប់សំពត់ពណ៌ខ្មៅ។
ដោយហេតុនេះទើបហៅពួករបស់មនុស្សទាំង៤ថ្នាក់នេះថា វណ្ណៈ ឬ ពណ៌ ដោយសំដៅពណ៌ សំពត់ដណ្ណប់នេះឯង លុះចំណេរកាលខាងថ្នាក់វង្សពូជ ពូជវង្សតរៀងមក។
រឿងពណ៌ទាំង៤នេះ សូមលើកយកតែពណ៌ពីរមកនិយាយ គឺពណ៌ក្រហម និងពណ៌ស។
១. ពណ៌ក្រហម ជាពណ៌ម្យ៉ាងដែលបញ្ជាក់អំពីភាពអង់អាចក្លាហាន មោះមុតដាច់ខាតឥតរាថយ មានគុណ២យ៉ាងគឺ៖ គុណសម្បត្តិ និង គុណវិបត្តិ។
អធិប្បាយ៖
ក. គុណសម្បត្តិ៖
ជាពណ៌ដែលស្ថិតនៅក្នុងត្រកូលអ្នកគ្រប់គ្រងប្រទេសដាច់ខាត មោះមុត អង់អាច ក្លាហាន ឧត្តមភេទ ភេទ អ្នកបួស ប្រសើរថ្លៃថ្លា លះបង់ខ្ពស់ ទង់ជ័យ ព្រះអរហត្ថ។ល។
ខ. គុណវិបត្តិ៖ ពណ៌ក្រហម តំណាងអោយឈាមដែលហូរចេញពីខ្លួន នៅក្នុងធម៌ព្រះអភិធម្ម លោកសំដែងអំពីពណ៌ក្រហមដែលធ្វើឲ្យទឹកចិត្តប្រែប្រួល បាត់ភាពថ្លាបរិសុទ្ធ សេចក្តីថា នៅក្នុងខ្លួនយើងមានទឹកមួយទូកដៃសម្រាប់រក្សាចិត្តដែលអាស្រ័យនៅក្នុងបេះដូង។ ទឹកនោម មានលក្ខណៈថ្លាល្អបរិសុទ្ធណាស់ ដ៏រាបណាមិនមានអារម្មណ៍ដ៏សៅហ្មងចូលទៅពីខាងក្រៅ ទេ។ ប៉ុន្តែបើភ្នែក ត្រចៀក ច្រមុះ អណ្តាត កាយ និង ចិត្តខ្លួនឯងនាំអារម្មណ៍ដែលជាលោភៈ ទោសៈ មោហៈ អកុសល ពីក្រៅចូលទៅក្នុងនោះ ធ្វើឲ្យទឹកបរិសុទ្ធមួយទូកដៃ លាយទៅជាក្រហមបាន ហើយស្តែងចេញមកវិញតាមសរសៃរសព្វសាព៌ាង្គកាយ ពិសេសគឺសណ្ឋានមុខ និង ច្រមុះរបស់យើងឡើងឈាមក្រហម ដែលធ្វើឲ្យកើតទៅជាជម្លោះទាស់ទែងកាប់សម្លាប់គ្នាឡើងដ៏សាហាវឃោរឃៅបំផុត។ ដូច្នេះហើយទើបជនជាតិខ្លះនៅក្នុងលោកមានចិន យួន ជាដើម គេយកពណ៌ក្រហមធ្វើជាគ្រឿងសក្ការៈគោរពបូជារបស់គេដូចជាអាទិ៍ ក្រដាសកុងម៉ា ដែលបិទភ្ជាប់ទៅនឹងក្តារហឹងជាភស្តុតាងស្រាប់។ ដើម្បីបញ្ជាក់ឲ្យឃើញលទ្ធផលកាន់តែ ច្បាស់ក្នុងរបបខ្មែរក្រហម គេកំណត់យកទង់ជាតិពណ៌ក្រហមដែលជានិមិត្តរូបនៃលទ្ធផល ផ្តាច់ការ និមិត្តរូបនៃឈាម ភាពអង់អាចក្លាហាន កាប់សម្លាប់ កាចសាហាវ ឃោរឃៅ ហិង្សារ សង្រ្គាម រហូតដល់មានចម្រៀង គេច្រៀងទុកជាភស្តុតាងថា បទទី១-ទង់ក្រហមបក់ឡើងរវិច ប្តេជ្ញាកំទេចរដ្ឋអំណាចជិះជាន់។ល។ បទទី២-ឈាមក្រហមច្រាលស្រោចស្រពក្រុងកម្ពុជា មាតុភូមិ។ល។ បទទី៣-ឈាមក្រហមឆ្អៅក្រាលនៅលើប្រថពី ឈាមដែលពលីរំដោះអស់ ប្រជាជន ឈាមកម្មករ-កសិករ បញ្ញាជន ឈាមយុវជន ព្រះសង្ឃហើយនិងនារី ឈាមកួច អណ្ណែតត្រសែតលើមេឃា ប្រែក្លាយជាទង់ក្រហម បដិវត្តន៍។ល។ ប៉ុណ្ណោះជាដើម បញ្ជាក់ថា ពណ៌ក្រហមមានគុណសម្បត្តិ និង គុណវិបត្តិដូច្នេះឯង។
២. ពណ៌ស ជាពណ៌ម៉្យាងដែលបញ្ជាក់ពីភាពស្អាតស្អំ មានសច្ចៈធម៌ យុត្តិធម៌ សង្គហៈធម៌ ជួយសង្រ្គោះដល់អ្នកដទៃដែលកំពុងមានសេចក្តីទុក្ខលំបាក មានសន្តិភាព មានខន្តី សេចក្តី អត់ធន់ សោរច្ចៈ សេចក្តីស្ងប់ស្ងៀម មានគុណ២យ៉ាងដែរគឺ៖
អធិប្បាយ៖
ក. គុណសម្បត្តិ៖ ជាពណ៌តំណាងឲ្យការជួយសង្រ្គោះដូចជាព្រះមុនីឥសី ស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ជួយ ប្រស់សត្វឲ្យរស់រានមានជីវិតឡើងវិញ។ គ្រូពេទ្យស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ជួយសង្រ្គោះមនុស្សជាជំងឺឲ្យជាសះស្បើយឡើងវិញ។ លោកអាចារ្យ តាជី ដូនជី សីលវត្ត សីលវត្តី ស្លៀកស ពាក់ស ដើម្បីរក្សាសីលចម្រើន សមាជិកកម្មដ្ឋាន និង វិបស្សនាកម្មដ្ឋាន លះបង់នូវកាយទុច្ច រិត វចីទុច្ចរិត សាងសន្សំនូវកុសលឲ្យកើតចម្រើនរុងរឿងឡើង។ ម៉្យាងទៀត ពណ៌ស តំណាង ឲ្យធម៌របស់ទេព្តា ដូចមាន ពុទ្ធភាសិតដែល ព្រះពុទ្ធទ្រង់សំដែងទុកមកថា ហិរិឱត្តប្បសម្បន្នា សុក្កធម្មសមា ហិតាសន្តោ សប្បវិសាលោកា ទេវធម្មាតិ វុច្ចរេ។
ប្រែថា៖
ពួកសប្បុរសមានសន្តានស្ងប់ បរិបូណ៍ដោយហិរិនិងឱត្តប្បៈ មានស្មារតីតម្កល់មាំ បណ្ឌិតទាំង ឡាយហៅថា ទេវធម៌ ក្នុងលោក។ ហិរិនិងឱត្តប្បៈទាំងពីរនេះជាលោកបាលធំ ធម៌ជួយរក្សាសត្វលោក និងពិភពលោក ឲ្យគង់វង់ មិនឲ្យវិនាសអន្តរាយទៅ។ ហិរិ គឺសេចក្តីខ្មាស់អំពើអាក្រក់ (ខ្មាសបាប) ឱត្តប្ប គឺសេចក្តីខ្លាច អំពើអាក្រក់ (ខ្មាសបាប) ធម៌ទាំងពីរនេះជាជន្ទល់ សម្រាប់ទ្រសីលមិនឲ្យបាត់បង់ កាលបើ សីលធម៌មាននៅដរាបណា ហើយមនុស្សសត្វតែងបានសុខចម្រើនសន្តិភាពដរាបនោះឯង។ ម៉្យាងទៀតបើពិនិត្យទៅលើឆព្វណ្ណរង្សីទាំង៦ពណ៌របស់ព្រះពុទ្ធជាម្ចាស់វិញ ពណ៌ក្រហមគឺជាពណ៌ដែលរំលឹកដល់ព្រះពោធិសត្វកាលទ្រង់កើតជាបទុមបណ្ឌិតមាននៅក្នុងចម្រៀងដាក់ទង់ ព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនា ដែលជាព្រះរាជនិពន្ធរបស់សម្តេចព្រះសង្ឍរាជួន ណាតថា៖
រស្មីក្រហមនោះណា កាលដែលមាតា ពស់ខាំស្លាប់ពិត បទុមស៊ូប្តូរជីវិត កាត់បេះដូងបិតធ្វើថ្នាំ មាតា។ ឯពណ៌សក៏រំលឹកដល់ព្រះពោធិសត្វកាលទ្រង់កើតជាព្រះវេស្សន្ត មានឃ្លាក្នុងចម្រៀង បទដាក់ទង់ ព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាថា៖
រស្មីពណ៌សសុទ្ធសាធ កាលដែលព្រះបាទវេស្សន្តរក្សត្រា ឲ្យដំរីសសោភាដល់ព្រាហ្មណ៍ ប្រាថ្នាយកពោធិញ្ញាណ។ បើយើងពិនិត្យទៅលើពណ៌ក្រហមនិងពណ៌សដែលមាននៅក្នុង ឆព្វណ្ណរង្សីទាំង៦ ពណ៌របស់ព្រះពុទ្ធនោះ យើងអាចឃើញថា ពណ៌ទាំងពីរមានអត្ថន័យគួរឲ្យ យកបានដូចគ្នា។ ប៉ុន្តែបើយើងពិនិត្យទៅលើអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិវិញនោះ យើងឃើញថា ក្រហមជាពណ៌ដែលចិននិងយួនគេសន្មតថា ជាទីគោរពចំពោះកុងម៉ា របស់គេទៅហើយ ឯពណ៌ស គឺជាពណ៌ដែលខ្មែរធ្លាប់ប្រើអម្បោះចងដៃតាំងពីយូរលង់ណាស់មកហើយ និង ក្លាយទៅជាអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិយើងយ៉ាងពិតប្រាកដ។ មួយវិញទៀត តាមទស្សនៈ ខ្ញុំ បាទអ្នកសរសេរផ្ទាល់ចង់ជម្រាបថា បើកូនកំលោះនិងកូនក្រមុំជាប់ខ្សែចិនផងខ្មែរផងគួរណាស់តែចងដៃអម្បោះពីរប្រភេទគឺសផងក្រហមផង បើខ្មែរសុទ្ធគួរចងអម្បោះពណ៌សសុទ្ធ បើចិនសុទ្ធ យួនសុទ្ធ គួរចងអម្បោះក្រហមសុទ្ធ ធ្វើយ៉ាងនេះ គឺដើម្បីរក្សាអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ ជាតិរបស់យើងរៀងៗខ្លួន ប៉ុន្តែមិនគួរប្រកាន់ជាតិសាន៍នោះឡើយ។
យោងតាមការវិភាគខាងលើ អាចឲ្យយើងធ្វើសេចក្តីសន្និដ្ឋានបានថា ចងដៃអម្បោះពណ៌ក្រហមមានន័យត្រឹមតែគោរពចំពោះព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាមួយប៉ុណ្ណោះ បាត់អត្តសញ្ញាណ របស់ជាតិ បើចងអម្បោះពណ៌ស គោរពព្រះពុទ្ធសាសនាផង គោរពអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិ ផង។ ដូចក្នុងសេចក្តីសន្និដ្ឋាន ខ្ញុំសូមអញ្ជើញអស់លោក អ្នកជាជនជាតិខ្មែរទាំងអស់ មេត្តា បែរមកចងដៃកូនប្រុស-កូនស្រីដោយអម្បោះពណ៌សវិញ ទើបឈ្មោះថាគោរពទៅតាមទំនៀម ទំលាប់ប្រពៃណីខ្មែរជួយថែរក្សានូវអត្តសញ្ញាណរបស់ជាតិយើងឲ្យបានគង់វង្ស និង ជាអ្នក មានកតញ្ញូតាចំពោះបុព្វបុរសខ្មែរ សមតាមសង្គហៈធម៌ទាំង៥យ៉ាង របស់កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ចំពោះអ្នកមានគុណគឺ៖
១. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា មាតាបិតាបានចិញ្ចឹមអញតាំងពីតូចរហូតមកដល់ប៉ុណ្ណេះ ឥឡូវគាត់ចាស់ជរាហើយ អញត្រូវចិញ្ចឹមលោកវិញ។
២. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា បើមាតាបិតាមានកិច្ចការធ្ងន់ អញត្រូវបញ្ឈប់កិច្ចការរបស់អញ សិន ហើយទៅជួយធ្វើកិច្ចការលោកវិញ។
៣. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា អញត្រូវថែរក្សា ការពារវង្សត្រកូលរបស់ខ្លួនឲ្យបានគង់វង្ស មិនត្រូវនិយាយសំដីណាមួយ ឬ ធ្វើអាកប្បកិរិយាណាមួយដែលធ្វើឲ្យថោកទាប ដល់វង្សត្រកូលជាតិសាសន៍របស់ខ្លួនឡើយ។
៤. កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវគិតថា អញត្រូវធ្វើខ្លួនឲ្យសមជាអ្នកទទួលកេរ្តិ៍មរតករបស់មាតាបិតា។
៥. លុះមាតាបិតាធ្វើមរណកាលទៅហើយ កូនប្រុស-កូនស្រី ត្រូវធ្វើបុណ្យឧទ្ទិសកុសលជូន លោកដោយសេចក្តីគោរព។
ដូច្នេះ ដើម្បីឲ្យសមជាត្រកូលកតញ្ញូ គួរប្រជាពលរដ្ឋខ្មែរទាំងអស់រក្សាវង្សត្រកូលរបស់ខ្មែរឲ្យ បានគង់វង្សតរៀងទៅ។
ខ. គុណវិបត្តិ៖ ជាពណ៌ដែលចុះចាញ់គេ បញ្ចប់ការតស៊ូ បញ្ចប់ពៀរវេរា។
ថ្ងៃច័ន្ទ ១១កើត ខែផល្គុន ឆ្នាំកុរ នព្វស័ក ព.ស ២៥៥១ ត្រូវនឹងថ្ងៃទី១៧ ខែមីនា ឆ្នាំ២០០៨។
(អត្ថបទដកស្រង់ពី៖ ការសែតកោះសន្តិភាពដេលី ថ្ងៃទី០១ ខែឧសភា ឆ្នាំ២០០៨)
គំនិតមានប្រយោជន៌
គំនិតល្អក្នុងការផ្ដល់ អត្ថន័យដល់ជីវិត
ការរស់នៅប្រចាំថ្ងៃ ប្រឈមទាំង រឿងល្អ និងអាក្រក់មក លាយឡំ គ្នាធ្វើឱ្យ លំបករកច្រកដំណោះស្រាយមិនចេះ អស់ មិនចេះហើយ ។ រឿង ទាំង នោះ ក៏បនផ្ដល់ជា បទពិសោធន៍ជិវិតមួយ ដែលកាន់តែ មានខ្លឹមសារដល់អ្នក ផងដែរ។
១- ជាការពិត សម្ព័ន្ធមិត្ដភាពមិនមានថ្ងៃ សាបសូន្យឡើយ ប៉ុន្ដែអ្នក អាចនឹង ភ្លេចខ្លួនថា មិត្ដភាពអាចប្រែប្រួលបាន។
២- នៅពេលអ្នកដឹងថា មិនមានអ្នកណាម្នាក់ជួយសង្គ្រោះ ក្នុងកាលៈទេសៈដែល អ្នកមានទុក្ខគ្មាននរណាចិត្ដល្អពិតប្រកដជាមួយអ្នកនៅ ពេលអ្នកមានសេចក្ដីសុខ ពេលនោះអ្នកនឹងស្វែងយល់ក្នុងការរកមិត្ដចិត្ដ ស្មោះជាមួយអ្នកបានហើយ។
៣- អតីតកាលជារឿងដែលកន្លងផុត ហើយអ្នកត្រូវតែជម្រុះចោល ការឈឺ ចាប់គ្រប់យ៉ាងដែលបានជួបប្រទះទៅតាមអតីតកាលនោះ ផងទៅ។
៤- កុំព្រងើយកន្ដើយ បេះបង់ចោល មនុស្សដែលអ្នកស្រឡាញ់ ពេញចិត្ដឱ្យសោះ. កុំ ចេះតែបណ្ដែតបណ្ដោយឱ្យមេត្រីភាពនោះសាប សូន្យ ព្រោះជីវិតមនុស្ស គឺខ្លី ណាស់ នឹងស្លាប់ថ្ងៃ ណាមួយក៏មិនដឹងដែរ។
៥- អ្នកមិនត្រូវស្លាប់ព្រោះតែក្ដីឈឺចាប់ក្នុងឆាកជីវិត ដែល កន្លងផុតទៅហើយទេ ប៉ុន្ដែនោះធ្វើឱ្យអ្នករឹតតែរឹងប៉ឹងឡើង.
៦- គួរកុំឱ្យខ្សែជីវិតអ្នករស់ពឹងផ្អែកលើអ្នកដទៃ ដើម្បីឱ្យអ្នករក ឃើញសេចក្ដីសុខ។
៧- ជីវិតអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ និងគ្រួសារជារឿងសំខាន់ ចូរកុំរួសរាន់ សម្រេច ចិត្ដងាយ ស្រួលៗពេក។
៨- ត្រូវសម្ដែងការរីករាយពេញចិត្ដចំពោះមនុស្សដែលអ្នក ស្រឡាញ់ជា រឿង រាល់ថ្ងៃ មិនមែនចេះព្រួយបរម្ភពីគេតែថ្ងៃបុណ្យ ឬថ្ងៃខួប កំណើតនោះទេ។
៩- មនុស្សឯទៀតជាច្រើនបនមកពាក់ព័ន្ធក្នុងជីវិតអ្នកទាំងដោយ ហេតុផល និងឱកាសដែលនាំមកនូវទាំងក្ដីសុខ និងមេរៀនជីវិតសម្រាប់អ្នក ទៀតផង។
១០- គ្រប់ពេលដែលខកចិត្ដអស់សង្ឃឹម អ្នកត្រូវមើលពិភពលោក ក្នុងផ្លូវល្អឱ្យបានច្រើន ។
១០ វិធីដើម្បីស្ងប់ចិត្ដ
ក្នុងខណៈដែលអ្នកមានអារម្មណ៍ពុះពោរ ដោយកំហឹងមើល ឃើញ អ្វីៗសុទ្ធតែខ្មៅងងឹតនោះ ស្ថានភាពនេះងាយនឹងបង្កអន្ដរាយខ្លាំង ណាស់។ ហេតុនេះគួរព្យាយាមរំលត់ហិង្សាទាំង ប៉ុន្មាន តាមវិធី១០យ៉ាងខាងក្រោម...។
១ - រាប់ពីមួយដល់ដប់
ចាប់ផ្ដើមវីធីដំបូងគឺយើងរាប់លេខក្នុង ចិត្ដ ពេលដែលយើង ខឹងអ្នកណា ម្នាក់យើងត្រូវ រាប់ពីមួយដល់ដប់ ឬលើសពីដប់ទៅក៏កាន់តែល្អ ទៀតព្រោះការ រាប់ លេខធ្វើឱ្យយើងមានសមាធិ (គឺសេចក្ដីស្ងប់កាយស្ងប់ចិត្ដ) ហើយថែមទាំង មានពេលពិចារណាគិតដល់អ្វីដែលអ្នកដទៃបន ធ្វើជាមួយយើង ។
២ -កុំអំពល់ទុក្ខ
បញ្ហាដែលកើតឡើងរាល់ថ្ងៃនេះមួយ ភាគដោយសារតែ យើងគិត ពី ខ្លួនឯងពេកប្រសិន បើយើងផ្លាស់ប្ដូរការគិត កុំជាប់ជំពាក់វិលវល់ ក្នុងវដ្ដសង្សារ ពេលនោះមិនថារឿងអ្វីក៏ ដោយ ក៏អាចក្លាយទៅរឿងតូចតាចបានទាំងអស់ ។
៣ - គួរចេះបំភ្លេចទុក្ខ
បញ្ហាដែលកើតឡើងរាល់ថ្ងៃនេះមួយ ភាគដោយសារតែយើងគិតពីខ្លួន ឯងពេកប្រសិន បើយើងផ្លាស់ប្ដូរការគិត កុំជាប់ជំពាក់វិលវល់ ក្នុងវដ្ដសង្សារ ពេល នោះមិនថារឿងអ្វីក៏ ដោយ ក៏អាចក្លាយទៅរឿងតូចតាចបនទាំងអស់ ។
៤ - គិតច្រើនពេកទេដឹង?
ការគិតច្រើនជាចំណែកមួយធ្វើឱ្យកើត ជម្ងឺស្ដ្រេសបាន បើមានរឿង រ៉ាវយ៉ាងនេះយ៉ាង នោះហើយចេះតែយក មកគិតរហូតដល់ដេក មិនលក់បក់ មិន ល្ហើយនោះ សាកប្ដូរគិតពីរឿងពិបាក ទៅជារឿងស្រួលៗវិញមើល ពីព្រោះការគិត នោះ ជាផ្លូវកំណត់ជីវិតរបស់យើង ។
៥ - ហាត់សមាធិ
ការធ្វើសមាធិធ្វើឱ្យចិត្ដស្ងប់នោះមាន ច្រើនវិធីចង់ដើរ ឬអង្គុយធ្វើ សមាធិក៏បាន។ កាល ណាគឺមានសតិ កាលណាមានសតិ គឺមានមានបញ្ញាបើកាល ណាមានឫាមានផ្លូវដោះស្រាយ។
៦ - ស្គាល់គេស្គាល់ឯង
ជួនកាលយើងគ្រាន់តែសំឡឹងត្រឹមតែ មើលទម្លាប់ពីអ្នកជិត ខាងយើង ក៏អាចរស់នៅក្នុង សង្គមជាមួយគេបាន ប៉ុន្ដែយើងត្រូវចេះរម្ងាប់អារម្មណ៍យើងផង ហើយយើងអាចជ្រាបបានថាគេជាមនុស្សប្រភេទយ៉ាងណាៗប្រសិនបើយើងទទួល យកមិនបានអ្នកត្រូវរស់នៅឆ្ងាយពីគេទើប ប្រសើរហើយ អាចចៀសឆ្ងាយ ពីបញ្ហា ទៀតផង។
៧ - សុំទោសគឺជាពាក្យប្រើបានរហូត
ប្រសិនបើយើងធ្វើខុសការប្រើពាក្យសុំ ទោសនោះវាជារឿងធម្មតា បំ ផុតមិនមែនជារឿង ពិបាកទេព្រោះពាក្យនេះមិនធ្វើឱ្យយើងអាប់ឱន ដែរឱ្យតែ យើងទទួលស្គាល់កំហុសដែលខ្លួនយើងបានប្រព្រឹត្ដថែមទាំងសុំអាចឱ្យស្ថានការណ៍ អាក្រក់ក្លាយជាល្អបាន។ យើងមិនគួរប្រើពាក្យ ទោសបែបប៉ប៉ាច់ប៉ប៉ោចទេ ព្រោះ ជាទំលាប់មិន ល្អ ធ្វើអ្វីត្រូវចេះប្រយ័ត្នប្រយែង ។
៨ - ញញឹមជានិច្ច
ស្នាមញញឹមអាចធ្វើឱ្យពិភពលោកនេះ ស្រស់ស្អាតបាន ប្រៀបដូច ពាក្យ ថា “បើអ្នក ញញឹមដាក់ពិភពលោកនោះពិភពលោកក៏ញញឹម រកអ្នកវិញដែរ”ទោះ បីអ្នកទៅកន្លែងណាក៏ដោយ ឱ្យតែមានស្នាមញញឹមអ្នក ដែលនៅជុំវិញក៏មាន អារម្មណ៍សប្បាយផងដែរ។
៩ - ដកដង្ហើមវែងៗ
ការដកដង្ហើមចេញចូលវែងយូរៗនិងធ្វើ ឱ្យយើងមានសតិគិត រឿងរ៉ាវ ដែលកើតឡើង ហើយធ្វើឱ្យរាងកាយយើអាចបន្ធូរបន្ថយពីកំហឹង។ ដូច្នេះ មុននឹង សម្រេចចិត្ដ ធ្វើអ្វីក្នុងពេលដែល មានអារម្មណ៍ខឹងសាកល,ងដកដង្ហើមចូលវែងៗ ហើយដក ដង្ហើមចេញយឺតៗនិងធ្វើឱ្យអារម្មណ៍ល្អ សុខភាពសប្បាយចិត្ដកាន់តែ ប្រសើរឡើង។
១០ - មិនគេចកែ
ប្រសិនបើយើងមិនអាចដោះស្រាយ បញ្ហាចំពោះមុខបាន បើយើងដើរ ចេញពី បញ្ហាគឺ យើងមិនព្រមទទួលយកការពិត។ត្រូវប្រើស តិពិចារណាឱ្យគ្រប់ ជ្រុងជ្រោយ ដើម្បីដោះស្រាយ បញ្ហានិងស្ដាប់គំនិតគំ និតអ្នកដទៃផងទើបអាចកែ សម្រួលបញ្ហា បាន ប្រសិន បើអ្វីដែលគេនិយាយ ប៉ប៉ាច់ប៉ប៉ោចមិន បាច់កង្វល់ នាំតែខាតពេល ។
Source: http://www.Ksn-new.com, ថ្ងៃទី០៨ មិថុនា ២០០៩
ការរស់នៅប្រចាំថ្ងៃ ប្រឈមទាំង រឿងល្អ និងអាក្រក់មក លាយឡំ គ្នាធ្វើឱ្យ លំបករកច្រកដំណោះស្រាយមិនចេះ អស់ មិនចេះហើយ ។ រឿង ទាំង នោះ ក៏បនផ្ដល់ជា បទពិសោធន៍ជិវិតមួយ ដែលកាន់តែ មានខ្លឹមសារដល់អ្នក ផងដែរ។
១- ជាការពិត សម្ព័ន្ធមិត្ដភាពមិនមានថ្ងៃ សាបសូន្យឡើយ ប៉ុន្ដែអ្នក អាចនឹង ភ្លេចខ្លួនថា មិត្ដភាពអាចប្រែប្រួលបាន។
២- នៅពេលអ្នកដឹងថា មិនមានអ្នកណាម្នាក់ជួយសង្គ្រោះ ក្នុងកាលៈទេសៈដែល អ្នកមានទុក្ខគ្មាននរណាចិត្ដល្អពិតប្រកដជាមួយអ្នកនៅ ពេលអ្នកមានសេចក្ដីសុខ ពេលនោះអ្នកនឹងស្វែងយល់ក្នុងការរកមិត្ដចិត្ដ ស្មោះជាមួយអ្នកបានហើយ។
៣- អតីតកាលជារឿងដែលកន្លងផុត ហើយអ្នកត្រូវតែជម្រុះចោល ការឈឺ ចាប់គ្រប់យ៉ាងដែលបានជួបប្រទះទៅតាមអតីតកាលនោះ ផងទៅ។
៤- កុំព្រងើយកន្ដើយ បេះបង់ចោល មនុស្សដែលអ្នកស្រឡាញ់ ពេញចិត្ដឱ្យសោះ. កុំ ចេះតែបណ្ដែតបណ្ដោយឱ្យមេត្រីភាពនោះសាប សូន្យ ព្រោះជីវិតមនុស្ស គឺខ្លី ណាស់ នឹងស្លាប់ថ្ងៃ ណាមួយក៏មិនដឹងដែរ។
៥- អ្នកមិនត្រូវស្លាប់ព្រោះតែក្ដីឈឺចាប់ក្នុងឆាកជីវិត ដែល កន្លងផុតទៅហើយទេ ប៉ុន្ដែនោះធ្វើឱ្យអ្នករឹតតែរឹងប៉ឹងឡើង.
៦- គួរកុំឱ្យខ្សែជីវិតអ្នករស់ពឹងផ្អែកលើអ្នកដទៃ ដើម្បីឱ្យអ្នករក ឃើញសេចក្ដីសុខ។
៧- ជីវិតអាពាហ៍ពិពាហ៍ និងគ្រួសារជារឿងសំខាន់ ចូរកុំរួសរាន់ សម្រេច ចិត្ដងាយ ស្រួលៗពេក។
៨- ត្រូវសម្ដែងការរីករាយពេញចិត្ដចំពោះមនុស្សដែលអ្នក ស្រឡាញ់ជា រឿង រាល់ថ្ងៃ មិនមែនចេះព្រួយបរម្ភពីគេតែថ្ងៃបុណ្យ ឬថ្ងៃខួប កំណើតនោះទេ។
៩- មនុស្សឯទៀតជាច្រើនបនមកពាក់ព័ន្ធក្នុងជីវិតអ្នកទាំងដោយ ហេតុផល និងឱកាសដែលនាំមកនូវទាំងក្ដីសុខ និងមេរៀនជីវិតសម្រាប់អ្នក ទៀតផង។
១០- គ្រប់ពេលដែលខកចិត្ដអស់សង្ឃឹម អ្នកត្រូវមើលពិភពលោក ក្នុងផ្លូវល្អឱ្យបានច្រើន ។
១០ វិធីដើម្បីស្ងប់ចិត្ដ
ក្នុងខណៈដែលអ្នកមានអារម្មណ៍ពុះពោរ ដោយកំហឹងមើល ឃើញ អ្វីៗសុទ្ធតែខ្មៅងងឹតនោះ ស្ថានភាពនេះងាយនឹងបង្កអន្ដរាយខ្លាំង ណាស់។ ហេតុនេះគួរព្យាយាមរំលត់ហិង្សាទាំង ប៉ុន្មាន តាមវិធី១០យ៉ាងខាងក្រោម...។
១ - រាប់ពីមួយដល់ដប់
ចាប់ផ្ដើមវីធីដំបូងគឺយើងរាប់លេខក្នុង ចិត្ដ ពេលដែលយើង ខឹងអ្នកណា ម្នាក់យើងត្រូវ រាប់ពីមួយដល់ដប់ ឬលើសពីដប់ទៅក៏កាន់តែល្អ ទៀតព្រោះការ រាប់ លេខធ្វើឱ្យយើងមានសមាធិ (គឺសេចក្ដីស្ងប់កាយស្ងប់ចិត្ដ) ហើយថែមទាំង មានពេលពិចារណាគិតដល់អ្វីដែលអ្នកដទៃបន ធ្វើជាមួយយើង ។
២ -កុំអំពល់ទុក្ខ
បញ្ហាដែលកើតឡើងរាល់ថ្ងៃនេះមួយ ភាគដោយសារតែ យើងគិត ពី ខ្លួនឯងពេកប្រសិន បើយើងផ្លាស់ប្ដូរការគិត កុំជាប់ជំពាក់វិលវល់ ក្នុងវដ្ដសង្សារ ពេលនោះមិនថារឿងអ្វីក៏ ដោយ ក៏អាចក្លាយទៅរឿងតូចតាចបានទាំងអស់ ។
៣ - គួរចេះបំភ្លេចទុក្ខ
បញ្ហាដែលកើតឡើងរាល់ថ្ងៃនេះមួយ ភាគដោយសារតែយើងគិតពីខ្លួន ឯងពេកប្រសិន បើយើងផ្លាស់ប្ដូរការគិត កុំជាប់ជំពាក់វិលវល់ ក្នុងវដ្ដសង្សារ ពេល នោះមិនថារឿងអ្វីក៏ ដោយ ក៏អាចក្លាយទៅរឿងតូចតាចបនទាំងអស់ ។
៤ - គិតច្រើនពេកទេដឹង?
ការគិតច្រើនជាចំណែកមួយធ្វើឱ្យកើត ជម្ងឺស្ដ្រេសបាន បើមានរឿង រ៉ាវយ៉ាងនេះយ៉ាង នោះហើយចេះតែយក មកគិតរហូតដល់ដេក មិនលក់បក់ មិន ល្ហើយនោះ សាកប្ដូរគិតពីរឿងពិបាក ទៅជារឿងស្រួលៗវិញមើល ពីព្រោះការគិត នោះ ជាផ្លូវកំណត់ជីវិតរបស់យើង ។
៥ - ហាត់សមាធិ
ការធ្វើសមាធិធ្វើឱ្យចិត្ដស្ងប់នោះមាន ច្រើនវិធីចង់ដើរ ឬអង្គុយធ្វើ សមាធិក៏បាន។ កាល ណាគឺមានសតិ កាលណាមានសតិ គឺមានមានបញ្ញាបើកាល ណាមានឫាមានផ្លូវដោះស្រាយ។
៦ - ស្គាល់គេស្គាល់ឯង
ជួនកាលយើងគ្រាន់តែសំឡឹងត្រឹមតែ មើលទម្លាប់ពីអ្នកជិត ខាងយើង ក៏អាចរស់នៅក្នុង សង្គមជាមួយគេបាន ប៉ុន្ដែយើងត្រូវចេះរម្ងាប់អារម្មណ៍យើងផង ហើយយើងអាចជ្រាបបានថាគេជាមនុស្សប្រភេទយ៉ាងណាៗប្រសិនបើយើងទទួល យកមិនបានអ្នកត្រូវរស់នៅឆ្ងាយពីគេទើប ប្រសើរហើយ អាចចៀសឆ្ងាយ ពីបញ្ហា ទៀតផង។
៧ - សុំទោសគឺជាពាក្យប្រើបានរហូត
ប្រសិនបើយើងធ្វើខុសការប្រើពាក្យសុំ ទោសនោះវាជារឿងធម្មតា បំ ផុតមិនមែនជារឿង ពិបាកទេព្រោះពាក្យនេះមិនធ្វើឱ្យយើងអាប់ឱន ដែរឱ្យតែ យើងទទួលស្គាល់កំហុសដែលខ្លួនយើងបានប្រព្រឹត្ដថែមទាំងសុំអាចឱ្យស្ថានការណ៍ អាក្រក់ក្លាយជាល្អបាន។ យើងមិនគួរប្រើពាក្យ ទោសបែបប៉ប៉ាច់ប៉ប៉ោចទេ ព្រោះ ជាទំលាប់មិន ល្អ ធ្វើអ្វីត្រូវចេះប្រយ័ត្នប្រយែង ។
៨ - ញញឹមជានិច្ច
ស្នាមញញឹមអាចធ្វើឱ្យពិភពលោកនេះ ស្រស់ស្អាតបាន ប្រៀបដូច ពាក្យ ថា “បើអ្នក ញញឹមដាក់ពិភពលោកនោះពិភពលោកក៏ញញឹម រកអ្នកវិញដែរ”ទោះ បីអ្នកទៅកន្លែងណាក៏ដោយ ឱ្យតែមានស្នាមញញឹមអ្នក ដែលនៅជុំវិញក៏មាន អារម្មណ៍សប្បាយផងដែរ។
៩ - ដកដង្ហើមវែងៗ
ការដកដង្ហើមចេញចូលវែងយូរៗនិងធ្វើ ឱ្យយើងមានសតិគិត រឿងរ៉ាវ ដែលកើតឡើង ហើយធ្វើឱ្យរាងកាយយើអាចបន្ធូរបន្ថយពីកំហឹង។ ដូច្នេះ មុននឹង សម្រេចចិត្ដ ធ្វើអ្វីក្នុងពេលដែល មានអារម្មណ៍ខឹងសាកល,ងដកដង្ហើមចូលវែងៗ ហើយដក ដង្ហើមចេញយឺតៗនិងធ្វើឱ្យអារម្មណ៍ល្អ សុខភាពសប្បាយចិត្ដកាន់តែ ប្រសើរឡើង។
១០ - មិនគេចកែ
ប្រសិនបើយើងមិនអាចដោះស្រាយ បញ្ហាចំពោះមុខបាន បើយើងដើរ ចេញពី បញ្ហាគឺ យើងមិនព្រមទទួលយកការពិត។ត្រូវប្រើស តិពិចារណាឱ្យគ្រប់ ជ្រុងជ្រោយ ដើម្បីដោះស្រាយ បញ្ហានិងស្ដាប់គំនិតគំ និតអ្នកដទៃផងទើបអាចកែ សម្រួលបញ្ហា បាន ប្រសិន បើអ្វីដែលគេនិយាយ ប៉ប៉ាច់ប៉ប៉ោចមិន បាច់កង្វល់ នាំតែខាតពេល ។
Source: http://www.Ksn-new.com, ថ្ងៃទី០៨ មិថុនា ២០០៩
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